Will this 5 year old do okay in kindergarten with out going to preschool?

Question

She went to preschool for two hours for about three days and then refused to go back.Her mother didn't make her go back.She didn't like listening and sitting still.She doesn't want to share and when she doesn't get her way

she hits another little girl that plays with .She doesn't know most of her basics yet.She's the baby of the family, and you can really tell it.She will be 5 years and 8 months when she starts kindergarten next year.

Answer 1

Yes most children have a year or two of preschool in this day and age but preschool is not required and only strongly reccomended, to help a child get a head start on what will be expected in Kindergarten.  There are still a significant number of children who do not go to preschool, and will always be, and not all preschools are the same, some are daycare facilities and believe that all children will "be ready" in their own time (developmental) and others are academic based (non developmental) and push the academics on children who are too young to be interested in learning (at two or three and even some fours).  

The biggest problem (it seems) here in this situation is the fact that the parents did not enforce how important it is to follow through with how the "school" thing works, ie even if a child does not want to go, they still need to go.  If a parent does not stand with the procedures in preschool it sets a bad precedent for actual elementary school(and reinforces the fact that the child runs the house not the parents).  

As far as learning and possible problems, think of it this way, in all the studies that have been done over the years, children who have been to preschool and those who have not are at the same learning level by the time they reach late 1st or 2nd grade.  As an adult in this childs life you and others can begin some of the basic learning tasks at any time ( there are lots of books, and games, and other learning materials avail) but it is important that the child be able to listen, and follow directions to be able to complete tasks.  

As far as the problem with social skills that is a learned process, once she is in the classroom if the hitting and hurting of others does not stop yes there will be major problems, so I would recommend that she go to a play group(with more than one or two children in the group) and begin playing together with others to help her learn to share, take turns and learn some "non-violent" ways to deal with others when she is angry.

Answer 2

Most kids have at least a year of preschool under their belts before they enter school. If she is exposed to other kids regularly,can dress and undress herself, can easily separate from her mother and is able to write her own name and  knows how to count to 20 and can take care of bodily functions unassisted, she will at least have a start at what is expected. At 5 1/2 she will be one of the oldest in her class and will be expected to behave  and follow direction fairly well. The first few days is a period of everone getting comfortable with the routine, but hitting biting and refusing to cooperate won't fly for very long. If her mother doesn't want to be called down to the school and dealing with kids that don't like her daughter, she should do something about it now. Five year olds are pretty vocal at telling eachother what is expected and what is "too babyish for a 5 year old" Her mother will be doing her daughter a huge favor if she exposes her to what is acceptable before she ever hits the door of the school.

Answer 3

She might not be ready and need to go to preschool a year before going to K. My great niece got held back in preschool for not playing with other kids. She has down syndrome so had spent too much time with therapist and other adults not enough with kids.

Your little one might mature in the next few months and be ready but is her parents don't make her go to preschool they may not make her go to school so she could flunk out of K.

If she also doesn't know basics like letters and numbers, shapes, colors and how to sit still and pay attention she may have a disability they haven't diagnosed or she could just have disfunctional parents.

Answer 4

It's not a question of whether she'll be smart enough to learn the basics in kindergarten, it's whether she'll be READY to learn well in kindergarten.  

If she's having those kinds of problems in preschool and they were never addressed or corrected...those same problems will still be there when she starts kindergarten.  Especially since her mother didn't make her go back to preschool.  

She won't be able to learn the basics if she can't listen, sit still, and treat others respectfully.  She'll have a really hard time and probably refuse to go back to kindergarten too.  But she won't get a choice; she'll need to finish, and it will be stressful for her and her mother.

I think she needs to have a successful year in preschool to make sure that those issues are taken care of.  Preschool isn't required, so it's a good place to practice and learn those skills.  She HAS to go to kindergarten, and she'll be much more successful there if she's learned the behavior stuff beforehand.

Also, kids who go to preschool ARE ahead of the kids who don't go, unless their parents make a special effort to teach them the basics at home before kindergarten starts.  It has nothing to do with which kids are the smartest, but...the kids who don't know the basics may FEEL less smart compared to the kids who learned them in preschool.  The kids who are ahead and the kids who are behind are treated differently in the classroom (the teachers don't do this on purpose, but it happens most of the time)  Their peers are also aware of how much they already know, and treat them accordingly.  

I remember a lot about kindergarten (I'm 24 now, and I work in child psychology).  My college roommate and I were in the same kindergarten class together, and we were the kids who were way ahead.  We helped our friends learn a lot of the basics...but they never caught up to where we were.  All the way through high school, the gaps were still there.  Everyone advanced, but we were still at the top.  She and I competed for grades and motivated each other.  I was valedictorian when I finished high school, and I thanked my friend for being so smart in kindergarten and motivating me to work hard.

It's not that our parents were competing to see who had the smartest kid.  Our parents didn't even know any of this until we told them (when we were much older).  It wasn't even competing for one of us to beat the other one.  We tried to MATCH what the other was doing.  Motivation, not pressure.  We tried to help the others catch up, but they didn't feel like they could because we were way ahead.  They started and didn't know their letters and numbers.  My friend and I could never remember NOT knowing letters and numbers, and we could both READ in kindergarten.

Knowing the basics ahead of time has nothing to do with your child's intelligence.  However, having that kind of edge can definitely give them the self-confidence they need to try hard and do well.  If anything, the child won't walk into kindergarten and feel like she is behind.

I went to two years of preschool; I started when I was four.  I'm not sure how many years my friend went, but her mother was also an elementary school teacher.  It makes a huge difference, and she'll be in much better shape academically and behaviorally if she does preschool first for practice.

Hope this helps.  Good luck!

Answer 5

She doesn't need to know her basics before entering kindergarten.  She will be taught that in kindergarten.  Because she doesn't know her basics now, doesn't make her any less smarter than the next kid who does know his basics.

It's like, if my kid doesn't go to preschool then she'll never learn anything in kindergarten and she'll be way behind the other kids.  It's like there's a competition, whose kid is smarter then the next.  We're talking preschool here.

Preschool was originally begun because of working mom's. They needed a place for there child to go, so mom could go to work.  Mom needed a babysitter.

The five year old little girl is being a 5 year old little girl.  What kid wants the share.  They may "want" to share (not all the time) sometime around college time.  Does any one of us grown ups really want to share 24/7?  Don't think so.  Sitting still is a feet in it's self.  Now they're suppose to listen too.   Not all kids are going to be the same.  No one in this world is perfect. Because her mom isn't pushing her to go to preschool, doesn't make her a bad mom.

She's the youngest in the family.  Probably has had more attention and has gotten away with more things than her older sibblings, but she will find out all on her own that's not going to happen when she starts kindergarden.

Who's to know if she'll be ready for kindergarden when the time comes.  A lot of kids don't start kindergarden until a year later.  They simply aren't mature enough yet.

Preschool is not an end all be all thing.  A lot of parents have a hard time letting there kids go period. They simply want them home with them.

People put too much signifigance on preschool.

Answer 6

I think she'll be okay with the learning, but the social skills are what she needs to be developing, otherwise, she'll be getting in trouble OFTEN in kindergarten.