Will you please critique my poem?

Question

She wondered the lonely sodden city streets,

the evening’s vain festivities now done.

Light caught in a pool of vomit casts her face

sneering at her doppelganger below,

distorted by chunks of innards and bile.

So elegantly made up was her visage

turned vile and curdled in the mirage.

Her designer dress was fine and lavish

an Armani singlet now torn and ravaged.

Now tired by her grotesque reflection,

she continues her weak ankled stumbles

into the night, numbed from ten WKDs.

Cocaine still present on her credit card.

A black Honda pulls up beside her – “Get in”

Answer 1

It's rather morbid.  But that makes the point.  If you really want to make your point though, you should separate the poem between when you're pointing out the bad effects and the good effects (because the five-four-five line thing really doesn't work).  Add alliteration of dizzying sounds like "broken bile" or "cocaine-- credit card".  You also need to make it less sentence-like.  Use dashes, commas, broken sentences.

Answer 2

I like it i would say a 3 out of 5

Answer 3

She wandered....

Answer 4

I love it

a great poem

about losing it all

to addiction. I don't know

if that's what its intended to be about

but I love it, that's how I see it.

I think your flow and your style

is one best I have ever seen...I just love it

Answer 5

I would lose a couple adjectives from the first line. Otherwise I think you've got it.