Women: What would you do if your husband left you or died?

Question

This question is for women who stay at home or only work part time, depending heavily on their spouses/boyfriends for health insurance and income. What if he leaves you? It's not a nice thing to contemplate, but with the divorce rate well over 50%, it's likely. Also, he could be killed, god forbid, in a horrible accident. If this happened and you were all of a sudden a single mom, how would you make ends meet? Do you have a plan in place?

Answer 1

I have never thought about the "if he leaves me" thing because I honestly do know my husband and he has a good track record of being a wonderful person. If he left- it would have to be something I did.. lol (but I wouldn't).

If he died I suppose I would get a job and have some life insurance from his death (gosh that's really sad to think about). I hope that doesn't happen. I would rather go before him and my kids.

Well, I didn't say the death thing wouldn't happen to me. If that did i am prepared. If we got divorced, I would get a job- I'm not incapable. he he

I actually am going back to work part time, soon, though (from home).. so I guess I don't qualify as a complete SAHM.

Answer 2

i don't know what I'd do. if he died i would still want my baby to have a mom and a dad, i wouldn't want my in-laws or parents to raise him so I'd look in to an open adoption. as for my self curl up in a ball and hope that i died too.

Answer 3

if you get divorced he will have to pay child support and you can sign up for food stamps and whatever else you qualify for ,thats why he pays taxes! if he gets killed or dies then you and the kids will draw social security survivors benefits

Answer 4

Im going to school to get my degree.  I'll be done in a little over a year.  I plan on working as soon as Im done because of how much money I will make compaired to what he makes.  So thats that.  If he left me before I was done with school, then my parents would help me in a heartbeat until I can graduate and get on my feet.  And if he passed away we have life insurance that would take care of us.

Answer 5

Ive made it with nothing before, and I can do it again.

I do think about this, because of my medical issues.  And for that reason, I have a lil bit of my own personal money in a trust in my aunts name.  Its not much, but its enough to do until I figured out what to do.  My spouse knows its there and how much I have.  It not really for that purpose only, but its the "its so big of an emergency that if I dont have that money I will be on the street" fund and can only be used in that kind of emergency, which is why its in my aunts name, and not mine.  The way it is set up, we both have to sign for any money to be released, and is willed back to me incase something happens to her.

He also has his own funds set aside.  Its money that his mom and him both have been contributing to since he was born.  Its actually for retirement, but he does have his own support.

Some people will say that you shouldnt do that if you really love your spouse.  I DO really love my spouse, but realistically, a lot can happen in 10, 20, 30... years.  I mean, really, can you honestly say that it doesnt matter the situation you would always stay together?  How many couples stay together when one is killed in a car wreck where one parent was driving?  Do you know for sure that you would?  Those kinds of situations where bad things happen, and even though its no ones fault, you just cant get past it?  They DO happen. Do you think any of those people were expecting it?  What about the couple where one gets cancer and the other one leaves?  Do you think any of those people thought their spouse would do that?  It happened to my cousin, and to this day she says she never would have thought that.  

Situations where its very easy to say what you would do right now, when its not in your face.

Answer 6

You should never depend on one person that much even if your a SAHM go to school get an education because as you just said anything could happen. You want to be able to stand on your own two feet. I am not married but I am a mother and even if I had the choice I dont think I could ever be like that. No disrespect to those that are but I have always wanted something out of life and I always have be independent. Plan for the future........bottom line Plan for mishaps you just have too. Good Luck

Answer 7

Life insurance....

Answer 8

If he passed away, we have life insurance. If he left me, I'd do my best to find a job and support myself and our children. I would not accept financial support from him and would do my best to prevent him from getting visitation because, in my opinion, if he chooses to leave our family he needs to leave completely. It's all or nothing- you either stay and be a family or you leave us alone.

Answer 9

If he left, I would have to try and make life miserable for him.

If he died, I would let his parents take care of all the funeral expenses.  That's their child they won't let him go done under without something special.  

If you have money to save or have life insurance plan it would be helpful.  But the most important thing is not to depend on anyone else but yourself.  And make sure you are in 100% good health with him or without.    

Make ends meet by getting a job and living with family or friends.  This is the most basic and full proof plan.  Assuming that you are in 100% good health.

Answer 10

When I was pregnant and for the first month or so after my son was born I believed strongly that if anything happened to my hubby I would have someone adopt our baby.  My hubby has 2 brothers and 2 sisters, so my plan then was to let one of them take our baby.  It was an unplanned pregnancy and one that I didn't really want, so then it was the best option.

Now, of course, I would keep him.  I am finishing up my bachelors degree and have 2 years left.  If anything happened to my hubby before I finished my degree I would most likely stay with some family, take out a ton in student loans, and finish up my schooling.  I know it would be hard, but I also know that they would help support me while I get up on my feet.  It would be absolutely ridiculous to imagine doing it, but we would be able to make it work with me working part time and family pitching in to help take care of my son.  My father in law works for a university, so I would be able to get a full tuition waiver if I transferred there, which would help a lot.  

After I finished my degree I would work.  Right now, according to plans, our son will be 3 when I finish school, so he would be able to go to a partial care preschool worst case.

If anything happened to my husband after I finish my schooling I will have my degree which will allow me to get a job and be okay.  It would be a struggle, but we'd be able to make it work.