Women and men: what are your views on name changes and marriage?

Question

and what about children's last names?

Answer 1

When I got married I hyphenated my last name and his, I have a very original family last name, and his is well normal, not as normal as Smith but pretty normal..

But when we have children they will have just his last name..lol..no need to torture them spelling out 10 letters! when they only have to spell out 4!

Answer 2

I don't feel it's a big deal either way.  Changing one's name is kindof a pain, but if some people want to do it to be romantic, more power to 'em.  I didn't, but if someone assumes my husband and I have the same last name, we'll answer to each other's names.

Answer 3

I have apprehensions either way for myself.  Knowing the history of coverture and the meaning behind the custom is a definite turn-off  However, considering that at present day the custom isn't meant to imply ownership but solidarity, I do see the value in having a family with the foundation of one name.

Don't know, maybe I'll see if he likes mine enough to take it. lol ya never know, It is a pretty good last name

Answer 4

The woman should change her last name to the man's.

This shows willingness to make sacrifices and it shows TRUE commitment to the relationship.

If the woman I decide to marry refuses to take my last name... then the wedding is OFF. It means she is not 100% committed and she is still thinking about herself. The kids get the last name of the man.

Answer 5

My wife kept her last name, I supported her either way. Our boys have my last name.

Answer 6

When I was really young, and married the first time I married a woman who was a little older, and a lot more dominant.  Out of what I thought was respect to her and her family name we did the hyphenation thing.  She took my name, but attached her own.  I was warned by my mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother as well as several aunts and cousins that this was a red flag, and that she had no intention of respecting me.  As it turns out this woman talked me into turning my back on Jesus, talked me into moving away from my family as soon as she had her degree.  Talked me into working two jobs instead of finishing my degree, and after our second child was born she divorced me, without being cheated on, without being hit.  Not having the respect to take a husband's name seems so minor, but it is a sign of a woman who intends to use a man to achieve her ends.  It's not really about the name itself.  Once she has what she wants she will no longer find him useful and discard him.  She didn't just disrespect my name, she disrespected my soul, my heart, and my manhood.  Now, I have to own that my mistakes are my own.  I should have had a spine, and I shouldn't have allowed youth and stupidity to cause me to close my ears to very good women in my family and even turn my back on Jesus for the sake of a woman who ultimately dragged me more than a thousand miles away from everyone I knew.  As hard as she's tried I still keep those children in my life.  I've allowed Jesus back into my heart, and I have a good wife now (we have our rough spots but marriage actually IS work) and my good wife's daughter has given her heart to me as daddy and we have also made a beautiful child together.  We will raise these children right, and under my name.  I am imperfect but I give all I am to being a good husband and father.

Answer 7

I believe in changing your name.  I'm not a very traditional person, but I like the idea of taking my husband's name (in the future, not married yet).  I think it just makes things easier too; financially, when you have kids, etc.

Answer 8

I will not take my husband's last name.  I'm professionally established in my name now.  I certainly wouldn't go about correcting everyone if the called me Mrs. His-last-name, but I'm not taking it.  

Kids would be given his last name.

Answer 9

I'm quite traditional, so I'd be happy to take my future husband's name and give our children his name also. It would signify that I belong to him, and openly connect us as a family unit.

It's personal choice really; I don't think there's anything wrong with women keeping their last names, or giving children combined names. Whatever works best for each couple. :)

Answer 10

Changing one's last name after marriage?  That is so "Twentienth century!"

Answer 11

I think a woman should keep her own last name, and Just change her title to Ms. or Mrs., whichever she perfers.

Answer 12

the woman changes her last name to her husband's last name. end of discussion.

Answer 13

I think that the women should change her last name because that is the traditional thing to do and the majority of women do. It also to me symbolize the unity that come with being married. Its a way for you family to become as "one". That is what i did and everyone on my side and my husbands side has done this so it just makes sense to me. I love having my "new" last name.

Hope this helps

God Bless

Answer 14

I have a hyphenated last name from my parents. I think that, were I to get married, I would keep my name. As for kids, I'm not sure what I'd do. I might combine my names and my spouse's name somehow, or make one of my names my kid's middle name.

Answer 15

I am very traditional and I took my husbands name. I think that taking his name is a way of honoring him and his heritage. My children will have his last name too.

I might have my maiden name used as one of my kids' middle name.

Answer 16

I think the couple should decide for themselves how they want the names to be arranged. If I were ever to get married, I would want to either combine our two names or keep our own.