Women hating men here..?

Question

as men we do get screwed in divorce and family courts. Is that a excuse to hate feminist? Or should we just work to change the court systems and not use it as a excuse to hate all women?

Answer 1

The parliament makes the law,and the court implements them,so democracy in play to be activated

Answer 2

When women tell you that we support more fairness regarding custody and support in the courts for men I think it negates any reason to hate.  But it begs the question, why hate anyway, what purpose will hate serve, will it change the laws.  I think not.

Answer 3

Sounds like a plan to me. Its easy to blame a whole group of people for the wrongs of a few; and even more easier to complain about things that we as people can take a stand against (with people who have the same feelings in common) and do something about.

For example, I found a group on line called S.A.F.E (Stop Abuse for Everyone) that I'm thinking about volunteering for within my community. I can honestly admit that reading some of the postings, and talking to some of the people off line has made me personally want to get back into volunteering to help men, women and children who're in need of assistance from domestic violence, sexual abuse, rape, and sexual assault.

I think some of you guys should check it out. You might find some interesting information about the organziation.  

Answer 4

Is there any valid excuse to hate an entire gender?

The family court system is what it is to serve as a deterrent to divorce.  As we can see, it does a poor job.  

Answer 5

"Great idea! It's not very logical to take things out on innocent people."

Unless the innocent people are the current generation of boys, in that case it's just dandy to sacrifice their well-being on the altar of feminism. So go ahead, brainwash them to feel inferior to girls, cast a blind eye when they are overmedicated (for being boys), be unconcerned when they don't do as well in school or enter college at similar rates to girls. Don't speak out when their role models are bumbling idiot males in the media. Ah, the hypocrisy!

Answer 6

You get screwed?  Oh, that must be why I'm still paying for my ex-husband's credit card for s*** he bought in 1996.  Ah, thanks!

Answer 7

I was able to protect myself so that I did not get screwed in my divorce: all my pre-marriage assets were in a family trust and I sequestered the equivalent of half the value of the assets acquired in marriage in gold and silver and kept those off-shore.  I am not talking vast sums here, but enough so that I could get back on my feet after it all went pear shaped.

I will not lower myself to hating a whole s*x just because the courts are biased and egregiously anti-male.  I choose to regard feminism with suspicion at best simply because it is largely hypocritical.

Answer 8

Hating feminists isn't the same thing as hating women.  You got the two mix up there.

Now..  How about feminists stop attacking men and fathers when they're trying to speak out against the bias court system?

http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/now.ph...

http://www.now.org/organiza/conferen/199...

Answer 9

When I got divorced, my ex-husband got the house and all of the furniture. I got to keep my clothes. While we were waiting for the divorce to be finalized, I got to pay the mortgage and all of his loans so my credit rating didn't go in the toilet. Exactly how did he get screwed?

Edit: I forgot about the car. He got to keep that too.

Answer 10

Another way to look at it would be to realize that these court systems were build and conceptualized by men, that they are currently dominated by men and that the laws in questions were drafted and are decided upon by an overwhelming majority of men.

It's also helpful to realize that although women do obtain custody of their children in most cases, they can hardly be considered to get the better end of the deal since they typically go on to raise their children in poverty, with or without child support. This is bad for the family, for the woman and for the children (half of whom are also male as it happens).

The view that court "favours women" because they are most often awarded custody suggests that children are a reward for winning the legal battle when this is not the case. Children represent a huge responsibility and in most cases what motivates custody battles is rarely a moral sense of what is right for the children (shared custody? shared financial responsibility according to income?) but rather a proprietary sense of wanting to keep the children motivated by greed and pride.

Hating feminists or hating women is absolutely not a solution to this, nor is expecting anyone to remain in an unhealthy or even abusive marriage. Though I certainly think that divorce should not be frivolous when children are involved, surely it would benefit all if we could come up with solutions that were less adversary and that involved mediation rather than confrontation in the court setting.

If you ask me, this has little to do with feminist and everything to do with the adversarial nature of our court and legal system, and everything to do with the sexist notion that most judges believe in (who are typically middle-aged white men, let's face it), that women are the best caretaker.

This is arguable of course, and since most divorces end in a he-said-she-said battle, the courts are forced to either make a default decision based on income and circumstance (who makes more money to pay child support vs. who works less or has a more flexible job to be available to care for the children), which typically leads to women having custody.

The fact remains, that no matter how much some men will complain that they have to support their children financially, the victims in this scenario are the countless children who are raised in poverty because of the fathers (not all, but those who do) attempt to punish their ex-wives or use child support money as leverage for visitation rights, while they are actually punishing their own children who are forced to live in poverty as a result.

Thanks for your question.

Answer 11

My advice to you is in seeking a mate in the future, let your head be your guide, and let your heart follow.

Answer 12

Sitting around and figuring out who to blame never accomplished anything. If it happens in the courts, it will change in the courts.

Answer 13

Do you hate feminists? Or do you hate women?

Not all women are feminists, and not all feminists are women.

Answer 14

Speaking on the poverty issue, my mother, a SAHM, with 4 children, a cheating husband, a house to pay mortgage on without a job because he didn't want her to have one got the better end of the deal when she HAD to go onto welfare just to feed us since his "support" was rather easy to work around with him being out of state, switching jobs constantly, and never once did he care to be a father! And when my mom did find an awesome man (12 years later), she had to bribe my biological father to release guardianship (so my now dad could adopt us) by saying  she'd have the courts forget about back support! I know in some cases the men might get screwed, but I agree with the women and children being in poverty being the end result which screws most mothers! However, at the end of the day, I don't hate men, just that sperm donor of a biological father of mine!!!