Women: would it bother you to know that your husband has slept around a lot?

Question

I often hear people say its nobody's business who your partner slept with before your partner got with you, so it should not bother you (assuming he is STD free and doesn't cheat). By "slept around a lot" I mean he has slept with hundreds of partners. If it doesn't bother you, to what extent would it be no problem? What if he slept with pretty much every girl you know at some point or another (all of your friends)? What if he has slept with your family members (sisters/mom/cousins et cetera)? To what extent would you be ok it with, and at what point does it become your business to know who he slept with?

Answer 1

I think people are most comfortable with others who have similar backgrounds. So, for me, I probably wouldn't attrack a man who had such a busy history. I would not date anyone who was involved with friends or family. The selectivity and privacy wouldn't be there. I don't need such complications.

If someone wants to tell, then they had better be ready for any outcome. I wouldn't ask if I had no reason to suspect he was a casanova.

C. :)

Answer 2

Believe me, people who claim to have had "hundreds" of s*x partners, usually haven't.

If he'd played around with my friends or family it ends there; what he did in the past is something else, it can't be changed.

Answer 3

if he had slept with all my friends, i would never date him to being with because i don't date people that have messed with my friends. thats gross. but if had slept around a lot (with people who were not in my social circle) i wouldn't really care. as long as he isn't still sleeping around when we are together, its doesn't matter.

the only way i might care is if any of those women he slept with were prostitutes. i would be pretty worried if he visited a hooker.

Answer 4

Hundreds? Yeah hundreds would sorta bother me because in my opinion s*x should be something that shows love. Would I consider this a deal breaker? Probably not as long as he has changed and wasn't s*x obsessed.

Sleeping with people I know would bother me a lot, since I would rather have our s*x life be something special between us rather then half the state population.

Family members? ...That would just borderline on weird. If I knew a guy was sleeping with a girl in my family I don't think I'd even try with him because it's creepy to think about and I would not want to hurt them (Same with friends)

I don't want my husband to be viewed as a man w***e, like I said if he had changed himself and stopped sleeping with everyone he could for awhile before I met him then I would feel a little better about it...But if he only stopped when he met me I don't think I'd necessarily feel comfortable with it due to his history of sleeping around.

It's my business if it's going to affect our relationship. If he slept with a good friend and that friend has feelings for him I deserve to know why, if he got someone pregnant before me I deserve to know about it. I think the only way you should discuss your sexual history is because A.) It currently affects your relationship B.) You're trying to understand each other better and know how far each of you are comfortable going.

Answer 5

for me virginity of my partner is a state of mind from the time i go out with him-period, nothing before that matters even if he slept with anyone i care for

Answer 6

What he did does not matter to me. I would not be with him if he had been my daughters boyfriend. I would not have entered into a relationship with my daughters ex

Answer 7

Hundreds?  Sorry thats not a stud thats a s**t.

I wouldn't date someone who had slept, with any of my friends, or family.  Pride thing, this also helps protect my friends.

let alone marry him.

For the most part past is the past....but there is a limit.

Answer 8

Sleeping with my mom and family members crosses the limit.. I want my husband to see my mother as his mother, so how can he do that when he's already slept with her?  It's our tradition to accept each other's families as our own blood, and that won't be possible if he's slept with my family members.

EDIT:

I agree with Top Contradictor.  I have yet to meet someone who has literally slept with "hundreds."  My promiscuous ex has been with about 30 partners, while I've had less than 20 (and I'm also considered promiscuous by others) .  Either people exaggerate to make it seem like they're getting a lot of action OR gossipy people make up rumours assuming that the promiscuous person is sleeping with hundreds (when it's much less than that).

Answer 9

It would bother me if he had slept with people that I knew, yes. But the past is just that the past. In another words, it would bother me but I wouldn't really be mad about it. Honestly, I would rather not know who he had slept with. There's just certain things that I don't need to know.

Answer 10

The past is the past,you cant change it and you cant expect your husband to not have a past,its like you can no who you end up with. That being said i would not get with someone who had been with all my friends in the 1st place nor would i be with someone who had been with my sisters or family.But thats a moral things.So my answer is as long as he was failthful to me and truithful then his past can stay where it is......in the past

Answer 11

I personally would only marry a virgin,.