Work or stay at home mum?

Question

I have a 5 yr old and a 4yr old, I dont drive and at the minute we get buses to and from across town to the private nursery my kids attend and I go to work. My5 yr old is starting school after summer, the school is right across the road from meand down the street, 5 minutes away, but tokeep working I need to get a child minder 7 till 5 so I can get the other one to nursery and me to work. i really dont know what is best - to keep working and traveling and running myself into the ground or stopping working and looking after the kids full time. I could do either. becuase I am a lone parent I will get benefits if I stop working, but I like working and I dont want to be at home all day everyday. But my ex husband left me with a lot of debt and I am at the stage of bankcrupcy anyway.

I just dont have a clue what is best for the children and me.

Answer 1

It would be best for you and your kids if you stayed with them.  The most important person in your kids lives is you, and this is when they need you most.  When they are both in school full time then you can look for a job that fits that schedule.  It sounds like it will only be another year or two before that is the case.

Answer 2

Take some time off, and look after your kids. If it helps kill the boredom get a part-time day job, or volunteer. Your kids will thank you when they're older. It's hard not having your mum or dad around when you get home from school. When they do get home they're too tired to talk or do anything. They just want you to do as you're told then go to bed.

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Answer 3

Stay at home and be there for them until both are in full time education. I have and will look for work / courses in September. You are doing the right thing for now. Good luck for the future.

Answer 4

Is it possible for you to take the little one to a nursery closer to your eldest's school? That might help. I think it would do a lot more for your self esteem - and financial situation - to stay working, and it's a much better example for the kids. Or can you put the elder in a school nearer your work? There must be some way you can work it?

If not, then you may have to stay at home until they're both in school - or just work part time. As a stay at home Mum I can safely stay that staying at home is harder than people think!!

Answer 5

What is best for the children is what is best for you..........if you are happy, so will they be.

I've been where you are so I know that the choices are hard. Maybe there is some compromise, but that might mean changing your job so you don't need the childminder 7-5! Paying for those hours must cut into your earnings a lot so after you've worked to pay for that what is left?

Answer 6

You will probably get slated for this question, but i agree with the 1st answer. Do the best for your family. Maybe you could see about going p/t

Answer 7

Work, no offense but it is rude to live off of the goverment. Unless you really need help, it you just want to stay at home that is LAZY!! You are really living off of the rest of us when you live off the goverment and if you can work work.

Answer 8

Your children are the most important things in an adults life but staying at home mom to me isn't a good carrer. This isn't the 1800's people. To take care of your kids u have to support them. Food, water, care, education, love. This is just my opinion so say i'm wrong.

Answer 9

I'm not a big believer in welfare.  Welfare should be used strictly to help those who are truly unable to provide for themselves and their families, and even then only for as long as is truly needed.  If you are able to work, you should.