Worried about my 6 year old daughter?

Question

I'm really worried about my 6 1/2 year old daughter. She seems to have very low self esteem. She would come home from school almost everyday complaining that no one likes her, and that she had no friends. She's also so scared to try new things. She thinks people are always watching her and criticizing her every move.

I don't know if I made her this way or what. I don't have the highest self esteem, but I've always praised her for her work and told her what a great little girl she is. She was the only child for almost 6 years, so I was a bit protective of her, but now I'm very worried about how things are turning out.

I don't know how to help her raise her self esteem. And I'm scared about the future if she's acting like this already. Please help! Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Answer 1

Is there something that she is particularly good at?  Like gymnastics, soccer etc. I'm sure there is.  If it is something that she is has a real niche for she can excel and that is a huge confidence builder.  She will also create friendships with kids that share those same interests. She will feel less inferior to them and more equal.  As for you being  "a bit protective" all moms want to do that and there is nothing wrong with that, just becareful that you don't absorb her life's lessons thinking that you are saving her from any pain.  You sound like a good mommy.  I bet she will grow up to be just fine.

Answer 2

First of all quit beating your self up..You did not "damage" your daughter...

Make sure she sees you as a confident mom..make sure she sees you taking the initiative to meet new people too...Most schools have family nights...take advantage of those night and make sure your child sees you walk up to new people and introduce yourself...make sure she sees that everyone has to make the first move sometimes....

Start watching your childs bookbag for opportunities...Girl Scouts, soccer, softball  all of these activities are usually announced through the school..You could even contact your local YMCA for some options to get her in some age appropriate activies with other kids.....

Answer 3

Children usually react this way due to a specific impetus or reason.  I would talk to her teacher to see if she/he can watch the other kids to see if your daughter is being bullied or teased.

It could be that she has changed recently because one of her 'popular' classmates has been giving her a hard time, saying things to her, etc.  Shutting down and not trying sounds like avoidance of being hurt or criticized.  

I would work to find out where the criticism is coming from and stop it.  Then, focus on rebuilding the damage that has been done.

Answer 4

How was she before she started school?  If she had higher self esteem, I would take a good, long, hard look at her school.  She may have had abusive teachers, bullying classmates, or inappropriate pressure places on her.

All the best.

Answer 5

To start with, you are the best example for your daughter. You set the example for self esteem and she will learn from you. Children are like mirrors or sponges, the reflect back or soak up the environment around them. Continue to praise her and just have one on one time with her (talking, getting ice cream) just so she knows she is always special. Also getting her involved  in an activity is good. Ballet, cheerleading, girl scouts...etc. That helps build positive relationships with other kids, helps her try new things, and kind of makes her be a little more outgoing.

Answer 6

If you feel she could improve upon her self-esteem, maybe you and your daughter could talk with her pediatrician?  Sometimes they have good advice, and can be helpful... they might direct you to some good books which can give you ideas to help boost her self-esteem, or they may refer you to a therapist, which can be very helpful

I think that each of us are born with anxieties, and personality differences.  Some of us are more introverted than others.  

I hope things work out and that you get some good, helpful answers here!

Answer 7

school these days, most likely its not your fault at all probably its just shes in a group of girls and everyone has a really close friend but she doesnt, and so they talk to each other and she feels left out.

and little girls can be b*****s, they critisize your every move sometimes.

i would suggest moving her to a school were she can have a best friend to reley on, and tell her how much you love her and all the family that love her. Hope that helps.