Would he divorce me over this if he knew?

Question

I asked myself would I had married my husband if he was terribly obese.My answer to myself was this.-

I don't think that I would have considering I would have had some physical attraction to him too.Looks aren't everything but they do matter.You can't marry someone and say "I love them but they aren't that pretty or I'm not attracted to them physically."If he got obese while in our marriage,I would stay with him,if he tried to lose the weight.If he became lazy and just decided to get fatter and fatter,I don't think that I could deal with that.

I love him for these reasons.-

I love him for these reasons by the way-

He's cute.

He's funny.

He's honest.

He's loyal.

He's kind.

He's nice.

He's shy.

He's cheerful.

He knows how to make me laugh.

I love being in his presence.

He's simple.

He's a little dorky.-I like that.

He's original.

He's understanding.

He's sensitive.

He's got great hair/eyes

Do you think that he would divorce me or be hurt if he knew about what I thought about him if he got fat or something?

Answer 1

Do you love him or his body? A lot of men, as they grow older find it terribly difficult to keep the pounds off. Their metabolism slows down, They slow down in general. I think that is a BIG reason why divorces happen after a long relationship. Either the man or the woman lose their physical beauty before the other one. The partner develops wander lust, has an affair and BAM it's over. Love and commitment seem to mean very little these days. It's sad really.

Answer 2

I don't think that he would divorce you for thinking this. He may be a little hurt if you told him though. Just hint and say "We should start eating healthier." or "Let's go for a run this morning." Keep him motivated and let him know that staying in shape, and being fit and healthy, are good priorities to have and keep. If he does get fat, bu decides to lose some weight, stick with hi, motivate him, and let him no that your there for him, and don't let him give up because you love him and care about his health. I'm only a teen so your not exactly getting advice from someone who has experiance. :) But if it helps, I helped my mom get into shape and fit and into helthier food.(sometimes snatching a bag of chips out of her hands, her thanking me later. :p )

Hope I helped,

God bless you and your husband,

Catherine O

Answer 3

You list one of the things you love about him as being understanding, so I'm going to guess no on the divorce question.  

Answer 4

No, I think it's okay.  You have to have that initial attraction before you can develop those deep feelings after you get to know them.

Answer 5

I don't think he would divorce you, but I think he'd be hurt.  But I think it would be okay with him to ask him if he thinks he has a weight issue. If he wants help to lose the weight, then maybe some support from you would be the best solution and if he doesn't want help and he doesn't think he has a weight issue, then that's in your terms on what size limit you will tolerate. But don't keep that to yourself, if he knows that there's a limit, it will make him realize that he MAY have a problem. It sounds like you still love him for the most important reasons.

Answer 6

If I were him, I might be hurt at first but then I would put things in perspective and realize that I would feel the exact same way.   You're not a bad person for thinking this!