Would it be better for my kids if i went to live with my ex?

Question

the short version is...

well im 18 right now and me and my ex have had some problems in the past.like i didnt tell him i was pregnant with his twins, and about 2 months ago he got in contact with me and we talked most of our issues out...he lives in boston now and weve both gotten our act together and we wouldnt be living as a couple...he's 3 years older then me and our twins are 2 but im just wondering if yall think it's a good idea, because i grew up without a dad and he grew up without one too so we'd like to have our kids growing up with a dad and he's earning like $25 hours an hour and i'd be making probably $10 per hour...

btw i live with my sister right now and she has her kids, and her boyfriend and also my other little sister is living with her so ya...

n btw i would have to leave florida which is where im staying right now...

the way we talked everything through though i think it would really work...

should i trust myself and just go up there

and also we'd be renting a 3 bedroom apt.[i had twins] so me, him and the kids would have our own separate bedrooms

WERE NOT GONNA BE LIVING AS A COUPLE!!!!

Answer 1

i think its a good idea but i also think that you two trying to live not being a couple will not work. i think it will end up yall as a couple or it may end up that you get a bf or he gets a gf and all h**l will break loose bc of the living arrangements. i believe that if you want to move up there to be around him for the kids and NOT be a couple, you should get your own place so there isnt any confusion or drama.

Answer 2

I'm going to say no for a couple of reasons-  If you get up there and it doesn't work, all the expense to move up there and the expense to move back will be killer.  Boston is an expensive place to live, too.

Second, everything always feels better long distance, but day to day with two babies, yikes. (I have twins, too).  Lots and lots of stress, financial, mentally.  Look, he's out of the picture, get him all the way out and open the door to a new person who will accept you with your children and no reserves, someone who really loves you.  That will never happen as long as your babies daddy is your room mate.

Recipe for disaster for you.  And the twins.

Answer 3

If you think it is best, you get on well and he is a good father then go ahead.But if not don't! But make sure you have a safety net if it doesn't work out, as your kids shouldn't be unsettled too much. Good luck!