Would it be better for our grandchildren never to meet us, their grandparents?

Question

An asperger says to his wife: "Because I feel that my father-in-law was rude and offensive to me, when he stayed alone with my wife to play music and when he bought my children a piano for Christmas, and when he asked me the phone number of a customer I had chosen for him to sell his car, and when he refused to pay for the new piano I had chosen in replacement of the one he had chosen without my advice, I have the right to ask you to be on my side, and decide not to bring our children to my parents-in-law"s for I need to be secure ; my father-in-law, your father, seemed so angry that he could talk badly of me to my children if I was not there all the time with them to protect them because they are too young to hear that." That was the reason why our daughter decided not to bring us her children, our grandchildren, and preferred to completely ignore our presence whereas she brought her children to her husband's parents ; it is the second time she has done that in ten years' marriage with him telling us that we did not "love her husband" because we "loved her too much". Because we have loved her much when she was not married, we must pay now by not knowing our grandchildren because of her husband's temperament. Can anyone explain how an asperger or any mentally-illed person can be followed on this matter? We feel deeply sad because we cannot see our grandchildren. Maybe that we should just accept the situation and continue to live as if our daughter had no children. But it would see harmful for the children and we have no right to say anything because our daughter says "we would like them to divorce". Weird situation.

Answer 1

Your daughter is blind, rude, and selfish. It's absurd what your son-in-law said, because it makes absolutly no sense. If they don't want you in their life then, don't be. But when they ask for money, help, ect. don't give it to them. She's your daughter, yes, but she is acting like some naive stranger.

Answer 2

This post was beyond confusing to read.  Can you space/break this into paragraphs at least?

I don't know what to tell you.  What does the "asperger's" ill feelings toward you have to do with you being able to see your grandkids.  I do not understand that.  Speak to you daughter, tell her it is fine for her husband not to like you, but why use the grandkids as leverage?  That's wrong.