Would it be ok to invite the adoptive parents??

Question

2 years ago i went through an adoption it is an open adoption. the adoptive parents and i have been keeping in touch via e-mail every so often. what i want to know is would it be appropriate to invite the adoptive parents to my wedding? do you think they or their child would feel offended? and what would you do if you were in the same situation?

Answer 1

Who in the world would be offended by being invited to a wedding!? Maybe a jealous ex - but anyone else should be thrilled for you!

Invite them!! I would even ask if YOUR (meaning both YOURS AND THEIRS) child could be in the wedding if he or she is old enough! You'd think that if you have a friendly relationship with them and you gave them a child that they would be honored to be invited and included in your happy day. The worst thing that could happen is them saying "no". (IMO, if they say "no" then you should re-examine your relationship!)

Congrats and best wishes on your wedding! I hope your WHOLE family can come share and support you on your big day!

Answer 2

Absolutely invite them!

Answer 3

Only you know if you have that sort of relationship. I would tend to think that you should put a little distance between your birth child's parents and your romantic life but it could be appropriate depending on your relationship with them.

When in doubt err on the side of restraint.  

Answer 4

I think including them and your child is a lovely idea.  If the child is older, I'd actually talk to the child (or email) whichever way felt more comfortable.

Then, if they do come.  I'd take some time before the wedding to spend with the child and maybe introduce your husband.  Let them know that he/she is so special and you are so happy that he/she could attend.  Monitor the situation and even ask if the child feels comfortable to be there.  

I'd also visit the child periodically throughout the event/day--how ever long they attend, to make sure the child does not feel left out.  

It's your big day- but it's your child's big day as well.

Answer 5

If you feel like they are really good friends that you've known your entire life than yes, you should invite them.  If you don't feel any way other than a friendly chat because they are your child's biological parents that no, it's probably not a good idea.  A wedding is a special day that you share with those that love you (sometimes the ones you dislike but are related by blood).  If the birth parents don't have that kind of bond with you than you might be better off not inviting them.

Answer 6

I think it would be a great idea to invite them. My children's fmom invited us all to her wedding.

Answer 7

My mom got married a few times after letting my grandma adopt me and my grandma asked me if I wanted to go and I didn't want to.  She never came around, so why would I want to go anywhere to see her?

Answer 8

yeah, if we talked & got along i would.

Answer 9

I think it would be fine!  They can always say no!

Answer 10

I think that would be a very nice thing to do. I can't imagine why they would be offended by it. If for some reason they feel it isn't appropriate to come they can always send regrets, but I think inviting them is a thoughtful gesture on your part. I think it would be great to have the child and the adoptive parents there for your special day, and if you want them to come, go for it!

Congratulations on your marriage. I wish you the best. :-)

Answer 11

i think it would be fine, if i was in your shoes then yes i would invite them