Would it hurt if you knew that you would never become a grandparent?

Question

Would it affect you if your found out that your kids never wanted kids, thus you won't be having grandchildren? How would that affect your life?

My dad wants grandkids to pass on the name and genes. s***w that! I'm won't be having kids ever in my life and I'm thinking of changing my name. No judging.

Answer 1

For one I don't know how old you are but if you are young you may at some point change your mind exspecially if you find a girl you are madly in love with and she wants kids. As far as having grandchildren yes I want some but it wouldn't be too upsetting not to have any. I love my son no matter what decisions he makes. Now to carry on the name I don't know why you want to change your name but that would truly make any person sad because they gave you a name for a reason and for you to change it would make them feel as if you didn't like what was given to you.

Answer 2

No, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest and I would be able to enjoy my retirement in peace and quiet.

Answer 3

depends upon the family. if you were the last son to carry the name or an only child, yes i woudl be hurt.

if you had other brothers or sisters it would be ok, but i would still like grandchildren from all of my kids to watch them grow.

each to their own!!!

Answer 4

My 23 year old daughter has no desire at all to have children.  So, right now, I don't expect to be a grandmother.  Does it bother me, not in the least.  I want my daughter to be happy and do what is right in her life.  If that means never having children, then so be it.   I would never, ever put any pressure on her to have kids just because I wanted to be grandma.  The idea that our children need to have kids to pass on our name and genes is just plain silly.  In the days of old, passing on your name and genes was important because that was how property and titles were passed on.  That may be important to the royalty of England, but is not important for the average person on the street.  

If you truly do not want children, then you should not have any.  Just make sure that the person you marry is of like mind.  Don't marry someone who is expecting to have children one day.  It will break up your marriage.  

Answer 5

I would be disappointed, if neither of my kids had kids, but it's their life, not mine.  I wouldn't nag them about it.  I'm not worried about the name or genes.  I just think it would be fun to have grand kids.  You are certainly entitled to make your own choices, but why are  you so angry about it?  

Answer 6

It wouldn't affect me if my kids never wanted children. It's totally up to them anyway.

But as for your name change... There's a lot of heiritage you'd be giving up, like it or not. But again, your name, your choice. If you were my kid... I know that would hurt, but I'd be sure you'd have your reasons.

Answer 7

No- To each it's own.  The world is becoming too much.

Answer 8

no..its my childs decision, i would rather not be a grandparent than be a grandparent to a child that my own child didnt want.  

Answer 9

Seeing youor name, I'd say that your still younge and that your feelings will change when you stop acting like a "player" and settle down with a girl you love---it'll happen

Answer 10

heck, I might not become a parent let alone a grandparent.  It's not because I don't want children, having children just hasn't worked out in my favor so far.

my mom died before she became a grandparent, and I know that she wanted to be a grandparent.  My brother and I were too young to have/support children when she died.  Had she lived she would be a grandparent because my brother has had 3 children.

Are you an only child or an only son?  Sometimes a desire for grandchildren is a selfish grab at immortality.  Your father may be thinking that if you don't have children then his line of the family name dies out and with it one day it will be as if he never existed.  And it could be nothing more than he would like to have young kids in his life again, but without the responsibility raising them.

If it's really annoying to you, then sit down with him and ask him why he wants to pressure you to raise children when you have no interest in it.  Find out what's really going on with him.  Then explain your thoughts and feelings on the subject to him.  Then drop it and ignore him when he starts in.  If he has other children who have children then tell him to appreciate what he has rather than what he doesn't.  

Suggest that he join an organization that does mentoring with children in need if he wants to interact with young people.

as for an actual name change--don't you think that's a bit drastic?  It still won't solve your problem with your parents putting pressure on you to have kids.

and folks:

Gamerman changes his user name on a fairly regular basis.  I don't know how old he is but I do know he is an adult and not a young teen.  If his past questions are any indication of his personality then this is a subject he's been struggling with for some time.

meh, then again for all I know he could just be an anit-baby troll who really has 6 or 8 kids.

Answer 11

I would be disappointed, but it's his decision. I've always wanted to be a grandparent. I'm not even a parent yet, ut I can only imagine what it's like. I mean, you can't be the parent you used to be to that little boy/girl anymore because they've grown. Being able to do it all again without actually raising a child would be amazing.

Answer 12

As long as my kids are healthy, happy, and responsible, it is their choice as to whether to have kids.  I have one son who is autistic, so I don't think he'll probably ever have kids. And if the other son doesn't, it is his choice.  Just like it is your choice and any other adult's choice.  (Although I don't know why you'd need to change your name not to have kids - your comment suggests there are other issues there - and its not just not wanting kids.)  Just my 2 cents. Good luck!