Would my daughters father get access?

Question

I would my to stop my daughters father from seeing her.

He was never there during my entire pregnancy, never came to her scans. Missed her birth and didnt get in contact till she was 8 and a half months old.

I started to allow him to see her with me being present.

We decided it would be a "every two" week thing.

3 months later and to put it bluntly..hes taking the p**s,

He'll decided when its best for HIM to see her, It can sometimes be upto a month untill he decides he wants to see her again. And he doesnt even text to ask how she is.

His family are pretty slack with it too. His sister cant be botherd and has only see my child twice (we were in contact...well..i say contact but it was very rare..during my pregnancy) His father cant be botherd.

Sorry i know this is long......but i think its best if i sever ties with him. I dont want him to be involved anymore.

So..my question is..if i cut contact and change my number is there a way that he'll get to see her?

(We have moved so he doesnt know our address)

Thankyou so much in advance for the help!

A desperate mother xx

Answer 1

He can take you to court, get support established, and see her anytime he wants.

Really, even though he may not be the ideal father, at least he DOES still want to see her, something thats somewhat rare these days. And as much as you don't want him there, it's unfair to your daughter to yank her away from him entirely now that she DOES and HAS began a bond with him. Running away and hiding will do you no good, because you'll still have to face her eventually and tell her, "Well, daddy wanted to see you sometimes, but I decided he shouldn't see you at all." How is she going to feel? Hurt? Angry at you for not giving HER the chance to know him? All of the above.

If he does take you to court, your hiding will only get you into trouble, ever heard of Parental Kidnapping? Think about it.. that term is there for a reason.

As for his name not being on the Birth Certificate, doesn't matter.. he establishes paternity, and thats all the court will need to know the truth, that he DOES in fact have as much right to that child as you do.

Denying her the change to grow up, knowing him... seeing what kind of father he is for herself can only have bad endings. Please, reconsider. It's far better for her to make her own decisions about him, as she grows and learns about him all on her own, WITHOUT your influencing her thoughts of him.

Answer 2

Try to change your number and do not contact him. If he doesn't contact you in any way, than he doesn't want anything to do with his child and you get what you want. However, if he does, tell him he has to see her on a regular basis and be more supportive to her. If he does not, than go to court and ask for resolution. The court may give you want you want or have him stick to a schedule and guidelines, but keep in mind you may have to as well. There is a case worker that should be making sure this happens (this happened to my aunt). if the case worker sees he does not do this, the case worker will be more on your side than his.

Answer 3

Legally, he has every right to see her for the sole reason that he is her biological father.  It doesn't matter if you hate each other, or if he's paying child support or not.... he's her kid, he has rights.

Your only real option is to petition the courts to sever his parental rights... which they generally won't do unless you have a d**n good reason.

I would be very careful about cutting off contact.  He can go to court just as easily as you can and demand to see his child.

Answer 4

I'm almost positive as long as he isn't giving child support he has no legal rights to see her, so as long as he isn't you should be in the clear.

Answer 5

If his name is on the birth certificate then he has parental rights. If he is paying child support then he has rights also..  He sounds like if you did end up changing your number and not contacting him then he wouldn't make the effort to find you.  I would still consult a lawyer about it because if it goes to a court case then he might argue that you were keeping her from him.  That wouldn't look good for you.

If his name is on the birth certificate you can either have him sign over his parental rights or you can let the courts decide that he shouldn't be in your daughter's life. If he is paying child support it would stop if he signs over rights but may not if the court says he's unfit to be in your daughter's life.  Just some things to think about.

Answer 6

I might get a thumbs down for this but here goes...

He seems like a real dead-beat. It's not good for your daughter to see him then not see him for months on end. It's inconsistent, it's not fair for him to do that to her.

I think you're doing to right thing by severing all contact with her. You can eventually get his parental rights taken away. My sister did that for her dead-beat baby daddy. She told him that she was going to have his rights taken away and he said that he'd be there for his daughter. Guess What? He didn't even show up for the hearing! TWICE! They had two court hearings! She even had a child support order than he didn't even pay and kept going to jail for non-payment.

Answer 7

Does he pay child support? Is he the legal father - meaning is his name on the birth certificate? If your answer is YES to any of these, then he has rights to see his daughter. However, these rights only have to be honored if they are court ordered - which would require him to fill out paperwork, pay fees and go to court to get the order. From what you said, he is lazy and can't be bothered. So, maybe it will be to your advantage to cut ties because he nor his family will probably hunt you down and be glad that you and your daughter have moved on.

Good luck ......  

Answer 8

Legally he does have the right to see her and even if hes not paying childsupport he still has the right to see his daugther. Sounds like you all need a court order for visitation and childsupport. Go file with the childsupport office and tell them your situation they are usually pretty good about getting things taken care of.. Even if she dosnt see him  ever he will still have to pay childsupport.

My oldest son is 18 as of July.. His father lives 4 states away and has never seen, spoken to, asked about, called him on his birthday, christmas or any other holiday. When I told him I was pregnant he denied being the father.. I had applied for assistance when he was a baby and in doing so I had to comply with childsupport and at that time a DNA test was done thru the state and it was 99.98% positive he was the father.. He paid for 18 years, without ever seeing his son.. It was his choice not to see him. I offered more then one time for him to see him and he refused everytime..

I know you said he isnt in her life like you think he should be and you want to cut all ties.. but legally he has to sign over his parental rights and if he did that.. he would no longer be obligated to pay her childsupport anymore. Also if you took off with her and not let him know where your at, he might be able to get you for kidnapping.. Im not sure about that thats why i said MIGHT.. Its best for you to talk to childsupport and get some advice from them. Also right now I'm dealing with my exhusband for not paying a court ordered childsupport case.. He hasnt paid his son anything in over 2 years and claims he cant find work to pay.. but yet hes able to find money for beer cigs and weed.. True deadbeat dad right there.. But he sees his son and talks to him on a regular basis... Good Luck!