Would someone give me a love/relationship reading?

Question

Would someone give me a love/relationship reading?

Answer 1

That's so funny.  I only do past to present because you really want to hear something nice,  but most love/relations readings suck.  

Form in your mind what you really "NEED" in a relationship and go after that,  what you "WANT" is not that important, if you get that then your lucky.  What really matters is friendship.  When all the flash and glitter wears off over time what you want is a friend that is going in the same direction you are.  That is the secret of long relationships.  

Answer 2

Here I go!

love......willl........lead......u....... named.......... Ivan Ponchovo a......Russian Wrestler......that has not won a match in........his life........you......will have.....7 kids......and be divorced......by the.....time you are 45......

Answer 3

Be aware that this is for the science of the paranormal, not a psychic hotline.

This is a real "reading" that I have done using rune stones. I should warn you, most people don't believe in this. As such, be also warned that people are likely to react negatively. I'm a skeptic, but I'm also clergy, and absolutely not a psychic, so this reading is done to help you understand or remind you of certain truths, and should not be interpreted as a prediction of the future. Oracles don't predict the future, they merely allow you to see the truth within yourself.

I'm assuming you're looking for a male, so the pronouns will reflect that. If it's wrong, just replace them with the correct ones for your preferences. The results of the nine-stone reading:

Pay attention to your heart. You will know the flow of love by a strong jolt of feeling that can only be described as "electric".

He will be the last person you expected to fall in love with. You will not want him at first, but keeping an open mind will lead you to certain love.

He will say something absolutely outrageous, and you will instantly love it. Others might give a negative opinion.

Take care that you protect your heart, for there are some things in your past that he is likely to not understand. Let him get to know the "you now" before you let him know the "you then". Honesty will carry you far in the relationship, but be aware that you cannot simply open yourself to someone and expect them to understand everything about you. (Phew! Difficult reading on that one!)

The dice have been thrown, but nobody yet knows the outcome. The universal framework on which all things rely is in motion, and so take care that you keep your eyes open.

He will be less than ideal for you at first, but as each day passes you will find that he is more and more perfect for what you need.

Don't fear being alone, for though the chill of the night touches you now, the promise of the future will make you strong enough to survive.

And that's the reading. Overall, I'd say you're going to be lucky in love, provided you keep your eyes open.

Answer 4

...you need more than just to ask someone to read you if you want a reading! The birth date, time and place of both people are needed to compare.

Go to http://www.astrology.com

Answer 5

You will <verb> an <adjective>, <adjective>, and <adjective> <gender>, who will <verb> you on a <adjective> trip to <place>, and <adverb> <verb> to <verb> you.

Fill in the blanks Mad Lib style to create your own astrological reading!  It will be just as accurate as any you get from a newspaper!  Your destiny is in your own hands!