Would you date a single mother/father?

Question

if you did what role would you want to take involving the children? and how would you feel about dealing with the ex on a regular basis?

Answer 1

before i went out with my boyfriend, i said to myself, "can i really handle all this baggage? i'm not really interested in him..." but, we totally hit it off the first date.. he was everything i have ever been looking for... and for over a year, we've been taking things very slowly... with the kids, for a long time, they knew me as dad's best friend, and i was nothing to them, other then a friend and confidant... then, several months later, i became dads girlfriend, and with the time, came respect, as an adult, and as dads girlfriend... i do not dicipline.. i tell them when they are doing something wrong, and the right way to do things, i never yell!!! i interviene on fights and other silly things - but i am there to be a friend and confidant, still, and nothing more...

dealing with the ex - well, she's a pain in the butt in general, but she doesnt do anything specifically to me.. the hard part is contradicting her, because there are things she says to the kids that are just wrong - like diet and exercise and food things, for example - i am a woman who has studied nutrition.. not an expert but i certainly know that there are benefits for a growing child to be eating pasta and potatoes and other things, even one who is ever so slightly overweight - you just can tput a kid on a no carb diet... yet, she thinks it would be good.. so, those are the kinds fo rediculous things i deal with - mostly her stupidity and doing our darndest to get more custody... so, thast my story, take it however you want...

just note - not every parent and step parent situation is the same.... they can vary in SSOOOOO many ways

Answer 2

I did marry a man who has two children.  They didn't live with him but visited him two weekends out of the month.  My husband married me and I was a single parent with one child.  It wasn't easy at first but each year got better and better.  I love my stepchildren with all of my heart just like I love my own child.  I do not at all get jealous of the ex because I know how he feels about her and it isn't good lol.  We are all civil to one another when we do see each other.  It is good for the kids sake.  I disagree with some of her parenting skills but all in all she doesn't bother me and I accept her for who she is.

Answer 3

Yes. But at any point in the beginning do you see drama starting involving the children, or you being around, or if he/she needs to spend an extended amount of time with ex..back off, and move on. Dealing with an ex is a part you accept in dating someone with children, but in no way should it involve any sort of abuse or name calling because he/she has a new lover.

Answer 4

I am a single mom and was never like these woman portray.  for one my current boyfriend is not my daughter's father she has one dad and even though we didn't work out he is her number one father no replacement.  

As for Shlane sweetie the kids always come first maybe with that attitude you might never get married.   My bf gets along with the ex for my daughter's sake not for his.  We have it set up to where we really never have to see each other so it is nice.  

There is nothing wrong with dating someone with kids you just have to remember that unless it is for the long haul you do not have to meet them until you are in a serious comitted relationship.

Answer 5

umm my husband was a single dad when i met him and i loved his lil boy and we been together 3 years now and i still don't let him call me mom cause that not my place he has a mom even thou she kinda of a ***** "sorry" but still i love him and treat no different then my son but i won't let him call me mom cause i would never do that to his mom cause she had a hard time with me being with his dad in the first place so i don't want to make thing hard between us already  

Answer 6

NO! N O! h**l NO! H E L L  N O!!! I honestly do not see the point. if he had to chose between spending time wit hhis child and you, who would he pick? and if he picked you wouldn't that be odd, what kind of father would he be?

edit: to cowgirl [lol you have a pink cowboy hate] I'm sorry a relationship is 2 people, a third one gets too crowded. Others might think it's ok or even go for it, I don't. why doesn't me liking men with kids have to do with me not geting married? there ARE men out there without kids...it's not tabou anymore...lol

Answer 7

yes I would..It would depend on what roll the father wanted me to play..if he just gets visitations of his child I obviously would not be playing the mommy role..and im a big girl and I can handle the EX..2nd my boyfriend of over a year has been there for me since I was 8 months pregnant and my ex left me..I knew him for 5 months before we started dating..He plays the father role he is there every single day and take care of her, my daughters father does nothing for her!

Answer 8

No, I wouldn't. My soon to be sis n law is with a guy who has 6 kids! She takes HER money and bends over backwards caring for them like they are her own.

Edit: I forgot to add that this guy treats her like c**p. Even put his hands on her.

Answer 9

I was a single mom of 3 and married a single dad of 1.  So yup.  

Answer 10

i would date a lady with kids as longs as she know that i wan only a relation ship and not marrieage.  if she wants more then she can go date someone else

Answer 11

I'm dating one, but nothing serious...I don't think I would be ok with the DRAMA...

Answer 12

I'm glad it worked out for you. But you appear to be a strong woman.. getting along with the ex even though you hate her.  I for one would try to avoid getting involved with a single father.  I just could not handle the stress of dealing with the ex.

Answer 13

I have, twice. I had no role.  

Answer 14

A friend and observer. Of course being an adult that is watching over them from time to time you can't help but intervene when the S**t hits the fan, but i would most definetely stay on the sidelines when it came to discipline and what not.

And as for the Ex I wouldn't deal with them. I'd be civil and curteous (regardless of my opinion of them) if I came in contact with them, and let the person who was sleeping with them at one point deal with their BS.