Would you ever put a child up for adoption? if so in what circumstances and if not what would you do?

Question

Would you ever put a child up for adoption? if so in what circumstances and if not what would you do?

Answer 1

No I would not put my child up for adoption.  what would I do about what?  Why are you wanting to know what people who would not put their children up for adoption, maybe you should rephrase your question and give a little more information.  Like if they are handicapped or feel you can't take it anymore.  I love my son unconditionally and feel I can raise him just fine on my own, so what I can do is raise him like I am suppose to do.

Answer 2

no

Answer 3

Nope. Not unless I was 17 naive and listening to adoption counselor propaganda about adoption being the most loving adoption...Oh wait that already happened!

Adoption causes so much pain. I would do anything in my power to prevent that pain from happening to anyone else in this world.

Are you in need of resources?

E-mail me and I will try to direct you toward some resources. Many people don't realize what resources are available to them, making it feel like the only way to provide a good life is to place, and agency feed on that propaganda by constantly reminding low income parents of how selfish they are for believing in keeping the family together.

I say, don't listen to that nonsense. Showing your child that love is the most important thing that makes a family will give them a sense of security that no pools, ponies, or piano lessons will give.

[e-mail]

Answer 4

No, I wouldn't. I was adopted, and I had an Identity crisis when I was 13. I was also put into foster homes as well. I have my child and I wouldn't give him up for the world.

Answer 5

No I wouldn't because in my religion we are taught that ALLAH(SWT) provides wealth to the family for each new child born.  Plus it's not fair to put my child up just because I made a mistake and got pregnant. Even if I was raped I wouldn't put my child up for adoption. I would raise it and love it just the same no matter how it was conceived.

Answer 6

I had two children and both ended up being put up for adoption, neither was totally by my choice and were dictated by the situation health-wise that I was in at the time.  When my first child was born, I was getting out of a very bad situation and was becoming catatonic very often - you can not take care of yourself let alone a baby when you physically can not move.  When my second child was 7 years old, my physical health was such that again I was barely able to care for myself let alone for a child - I have since been declared disabled because of those symptoms.  My first child was adopted within my family so I was able to observe him while he grew up and can say with certainty that he grew up much happier and healthier than he probably would have ended up had he remained with me.  My other child has been adopted outside of my family so I have no contact with her so I will not know about her until after she turns 18, if she decides to contact me then.

Answer 7

it may be hard in circumstances like when someone falls pregnant after a rape to keep the kid! i dont think i could keep the kid not that it was his/her fault i would just find it really hard!

Answer 8

yes, if I had no one in my family to take care of my children and I was seriously ill, I would.  That is for the children I have already.  If I found myself alone and pregnant with limited to no resources, I might also consider it for the best interest of the child. I know some people even those who are adopted, think there is no excuse but you have to walk in that person shoes to fully understand why they made the choices they make and weather you agree or not, know they are making the best choice that they think they can. And you can not ask more of a person

Answer 9

yes u put a baby up for adoption if you dont have the money or time for it.

i kno it so so so so so so so so sad....

:(            :(               :(              :(           :(

Answer 10

I am in the process of putting my unborn child up for adoption. I thought about keeping her but honestly...It is not fair to her. She deserves the best and that is not something I can give her right now and I dont know when I would be able to give her the best.

I thought long and hard about my decision. I chose the family myself out of many! I am very happy with the decision I am making. I know she will be well taken care of and get all she deserves out of life. I have read a couple of answers and it is not that I do NOT love my child. I love her so much I have decided to do this. The family she is going to already has a 2 yr old son they adopted and he is the happiest little boy I have ever met!

If youd like anyone can message me and ask me more.

Answer 11

It would depend on the situation I’m 24 had I ever had had a child in my teens I’d have put them up for adoption. I’m adopted myself and I’m glad my birthmother was willing to give me up thus giving me a better life then she could ever have given me.  If I had one now I would seriously consider it also since I couldn’t provide and give the child the best life possible at this time. I’d write a letter to the child telling them a bit about me and why I gave them up and ask the adopted parents to give it to the child when he or she was at least 15. I’d also give them any medical information which grant it wouldn’t be much since I’m also adopted and don’t have that, but I could tell them any illness  I’ve had stuff like that.

If I could finical care for the baby and give it the best life i could then yes i would keep him or her even if i had to be a single parent.

Answer 12

Im sorry but there simply is NO reason that i can think of to give your child away!

If the mum is finding it hard to cope in some way, there is always help out there for her, she simply has to ask for it.

What ever problem she may feel is there, believe me people outhere care and are willing to help, if asked.

You said if not then what would you do????

I would try the best i could to raise the child with support from as many people as posiible.

JUST ASK

Answer 13

Been there, done that due to bullies and lies. Would never do again.  I'll live off welfare if I have to, since the state didn't protect us in the first place.

Answer 14

would i put a child up for adoption? well let me see i was adopted at an early age because my mum was 14 at the time of having me and she used to leave me along with my two brothers in dirty nappies filthy environment and alone for long periods of time. she had mental health problems and was forced to put all of us up for adoption.

i dont disagree with adoption because it has given me a much better life, but having said that i think for someone to consider having their chil adopted just because they no longer want the child is wrong....if the child is in danger of being abused or neglected then i think they should be adopted but only if it really is the last avenue to take.

unfortunately in this day and age there is a lot of very young mothers but there is an upside the support available to them is immense with a wide variety of public bodies out there to help them through there times of need.

adoption is really only for those that would benefit from being away from their natural parents because of lack of quality in their life.....there is no excuse just to adopt a child because of regrets and that they no longer want a child.....believe me i went through h**l when i found out i was adopted i resented my adoptive parents with a vengeance and did everything i could in my power to make them unhappy but in hindsight i wish i hadnt i am now 35 years old and i went to find my birth mother after reading my social services file she really was the mother from h**l and i no longer have any form of contact with her.......so do you adopt????? are you such a bad parent that you cant cope with a child that you brought into the world........take a long hard look at yourself and then decide but remember the child is yours you decided to bring it into the world and you have responsibilities towards the said child

Answer 15

Absolutely not.

I did it once, and I'll never, ever do it again. I bought into the whole "adoption is a beautiful choice; adoption is the loving option" propaganda in the conservative Christian culture. Giving away my child was the biggest mistake of my life.

Children DESERVE to keep their families and culture and heritage. Adoption should only become an option when the child will be hurt or die without it.

If I got pregnant at a bad time again, I'd either have an abortion or simply find a way to make parenting work. Period.

I used to be pro-life before relinquishing my daughter. I'm now pro-choice. Adoption is worse than anything I had imagined... and I'd rather abort a fetus than load the pain of feeling rejected and unloved on my future child, and I'd much rather deal with the fallout of an abortion for myself than go through the trauma of relinquishing again.

Answer 16

why u cant aford the child or u dont like it

Answer 17

I have put two children up for adoption.  Once was an extra-maritial affair.,..I was young, stupid and was going through a divorce.  The second one was due to financial complications and the fact that I am a single mother and wanted the best for my new baby.  He was adopted by an absolutely wonderful family who sends me emails and pictures each month.  Go with your gut.  You are the only one who knows deep down inside what is best for you and your baby.  Many adoption agencies offer financial assistance to help you get back on your feet after adoption.  Do your research and trust your own instincts.

Answer 18

Of course I would... I would like to think that I am not so selfish that I would rather put my baby through a hard, difficult life, then a life where two parents loved and supported it.  The circumstances would vary... things such as timing, finances, fathers involvement etc.

Adoption is wonderful... I was adopted and so was my husband.  It was a blessing!

Answer 19

I am considering adoption for my unborn baby girl. I want her to have the best life possible. Sure I can supply her with all the love necessary for her mental and emotional development. I look at the financial situation and wonder if I am able to provide the support she needs. I want my children to have everything they need and some things they want. I don't want my child to go without and I want her to have the best opportunities life has to offer.

Some say I'm selfish for giving my baby up and some even have said that it's obvious that women don't bond with their baby before it's born. That's c**p because this is the hardest decision I have ever had to make and it can be very depressing at times and I cry just thinking about it. She's a part of me and she's my child no matter who I give her to. But I have to think of her well being before my own.

Answer 20

Never,never,never..not for adoption nor in care.They are not children for long and no matter what the problem it is a parents responsibility to care for their child.Support for the family can ensure the parents and child stay together.Only if a child is in danger from the parents that cannot be resolved would i advocate for adoption and only when other extended family options had been explored and deemed unsuitable.

Answer 21

No, I cannot imagine a circumstance when I would put any child of mine up for adoption in my current situation anyway.

I would do whatever it took to keep my child, work a job I hated, go without so they could have what they need.

Ensure child had love and was well cared for and got the best I could give, it is not about material things and money it is about a bond and being a family.

If I had been pregnant at 14 or if I became a substance misuser or somthing like that I know that my family would look after the child until I sorted myself out, if I didnt have family or friends then I would rely on agencies to make the right decisions for all of us I guess.

I suppose if I was going to prison or something and had no relatives or close friends then there would be no alternative to my child being cared for someone else, whether I would agree to adoption I suppose would be a long way down the road depending on situation.

I guess we never know what is round the corner and just need to ensure we do not end up in those kind of sitautions.

Answer 22

NO i would not cause you never now what will go on in the home there will be in and they will be very hurt cause they will think that nobody will care for them

Answer 23

please give a bit more info then maybe we can help you.many many people give up children for adoption for many many reasons

Answer 24

Yes to give the child the things that you can not...I have given a baby up for adoption and it was the best thing for him. It is an open adoption even though it was 22 years ago I still have contact with the young man and his family. Children deserve the best that their is to offer....I made my decision based on what was going on at home at the time....my mom was having an affair everyone knew except my dad, my younger sister was pregnant also she ke[t her son and in has been in prison for the last 3 years and had 4 more to go...Environment is very important and I could not offer a safe and secure home for the baby I look at my nephew and know I made the right decision he is 2 months younger than the baby I gave up....There are so many families out there that want to provide for a child and they themselves can't get pregnant..prospective parents have to go through a great deal just to be considered an adoptive parent, and I chose my baby's parents they are still married which brings me joy!!! I was married but my husband passed away when the family found this out they flew to be there for myself and our son....Adoption is not an end but a beginning!

Answer 25

If I was unwed and pregnant, and unable to financially support my baby, yes, I would put it up for adoption.  There are many, many people that cannot have a child of their own that would welcome a little one into their homes and raise and support it as if it were theirs.

Answer 26

If I truly could not give my child what they needed (emotionally, physically, or mentally) or could not protect them, or did not want to be a parent, or felt like I might harm my child, then I pray to God that I would have the courage and strength to let them have a good life with another parent, no matter how it may hurt me..

Answer 27

if i got pregnant from a rape i would probably give it up for adoption. if it was from my own fault then i would probably keep it though it would be a very big change.

Answer 28

Never.

I've lived the reality of adoption - I am an adoptee.

I would never do that to my own child.

Living your entire life wondering what you had done wrong to be given up by your own mother - I would NEVER put my own children through that grief.

Answer 29

I could never give my child up for adoption.  I would scrub toilets with my baby tied on my back before I would subject myself and my child to separation from each other.  If I were still in school, I would have asked my family for help with a promise to pay them back.

Answer 30

Nope if i had some kind of serious problem my sister or parents would look after the kid. I would prefer to have the child even now at 19 than to give it away i would survive somehow.

Answer 31

I did 11 years ago.

I was raped and going to college. I had no idea who raped me so pressing charges was not an option.

Last year I found the family and I am in contact with them. Infact I just had ice cream with them 2 nights ago. :-}

This makes it easier in case they need medical info.

There was only a few times where I wondered if I was doing the right thing or not. All I have to do is look at her family picture and know that I did.