Would you get angry or bad mouth someone who keeps to themself?

Question

a.) they only talk to you unless you intiate the conversation- so you say hi first

b.) they keep to themself and keep themselves entertained in their room or with other friends

c.) they spend a good amount of time alone- writing, drawing, painting, sewing, etc-

i lived on a college campus for like 3 years and kept to myself- and spoke when spoken to- if not i won't speak- i used to speak all the time prior- and i just felt like it wasn't up to me to speak to my roommates or the girls living on the hall-

a rumor spread i was mean- rude- depressed- because i didnt speak or hang out with them-

i personally feel i owe no one anything and i open up when i want to-

but to have people giving me the evil eye and spreading outlandish gossip and rumors because i keep to myself- is just sad!

Answer 1

Just clarify it with your room mates or whoever you think should know. Probably your room mates because they're the ones that live with you. Just tell them you're shy and didn't know what you should say. Just explain that you're shy, people are generally nicer once they know the real reason behind something. I'm the same way

Answer 2

No, I wouldn't get angry and bad mouth someone who kept to themself.  Some people prefer it that way and others who don't understand either need to understand that or accept it and move on. I think they are telling the truth when they feel that you're rude and whatever else they said but that's just because they don't get why someone likes their solitude.  Most people are desperate to fit in and be with people and other people like yourself enjoy your me time.  It bothers me when THOSE people can't accept it and keep harping on about it.  

Answer 3

No I dont see  nothing wrong with it. Nothing at all!

I did that at my previous Job I found that most people there where not trustworthy after being burned badly on more then one occasion. . I would not rather associate with people at work. They where also mad becasue I would not open up to them and create more drama.Because they had no life of thier own.

People have to earn my trust. The only person I really  trust is God. He isnt going to let me down or burn me like people do..

I am not paranoid I just know that everyone who says they are a friend is not. Shady uncaring  people I can do without.  

Answer 4

I wouldn't, but I am just a wonderful, understanding person.

But I can see that it could be considered selfish, being nice to people is not too difficult, you could say hello, how are you? even if you don't expect it from others, it's just recognising others, if they like to be said hello to, what harm does it do you to say hello to them?

Even saying, in a friendly way, that you like to be alone is a communication, and would serve all concerned.

I wouldn't think you were rude or depressed, just someone who was a bit thoughtless of other's feelings, but more than that a bit insecure, and fearful of rejection, and being fearful of that, you give people a reason to do that, rather than risk the real you being rejected.

Or it might be something completely different.

Answer 5

Just concentrate on your studies. Those idiots expecting you to be something you are not are the future dropouts. There's gonna be a time where they need people like you: the quiet ones, so they can do their studies in peace and quiet.

I say, s***w them. Who cares what social reputation you get. This is not about them but about your future. And thats all you should care about, IMO.  

Answer 6

People always get ticked off when someone is reserved and soft spoken. I know because thats exactly how I am. They wonder "whats wrong with her?" "Does she think she's too good for us?" on and on. Just ignore them and be you. Sometimes the less you speak the more people respect you. Dont answer back to these rumors if they are unfounded and mean and most importantly untrue.

Answer 7

Well, he's an introvert. Try to get to know him. Learn about his hobbies. See if you have anything in common. Why should you badmouth somebody? Introvert guys are often interesting and insightful. Trust me about this one.

Answer 8

just worry about yourself.  You will not know probably any of these people in 5 or 10 years.  People did the same to me in high school, and you know what?  I made my life a lot better than they did.  It will pass just try not to let the dumb rumors bother you.