Would you give it to him?

Question

Imagine you have 3 kids, all ages 5 and under. Its time for bed, and they all need snacks. Its been a long day and everyone is grumpy and tired. So as a parent, you grab something quick, which turns out to be 3 oranges. All the kids like them, and you have seen them eat oranges before.

Then the oldest, age 5, says he doesnt like oranges, that he wants an apple. But he doesnt say anything until after you have already cut up the orange..

Would you give him the apple? Or would you tell him he has to eat the orange and if he doesnt, he gets nothing else?

Answer 1

5 years old...hmm okay id say no to the apple. id say you get what you get and you dont throw a fit. i wouldnt let him have anything else because if hes hungry enough he will eat the orange. if you give in to little stuff like that, whats next you know?

Answer 2

I have 3 children now they are older but this is what I did when they were younger and actually still do.  And by the way it's always the eldest!!!!  I give them a choice wither they eat or they don't get anything.  Once you you start going back to change the food it will be past their bed time, and total throw your system off - if you give into one then all of them will be changing their minds.

They should be able to decide before you prepare but once it's done it's too late, and don't let them choose from a long list of items either.

LOL

Answer 3

Orange today, apple tomorrow.

Answer 4

I'd Cut him up an apple

Answer 5

This is definitely a pick your battle kind of decision. It all depends on your child and what the motivation is. Are they just trying to be contrary or test limits? If so then no, I wouldnt give them the apple. Do they truly not want an orange and would prefer an apple? Then I dont see the harm in giving them the apple. It isnt like they are asking for a chocolate bar instead. Also you have to consider what the other kids are going to do...are they going to be okay if one has something different or is it going to cause a fight? There are a lot of factors here which unfortunately only you can determine as you know your kids best.

Answer 6

if i know the kid likes it then yeah the kid would eat it unless asked ahead of time, not after i cut it. Most likely the child would eat it unless testing you to see what you would do. If you break after saying, you eat the orange or get nothing & give in to the whining the you have a problem bc then its likely to happen again bc the child knows that he/she could get away with it.

Answer 7

I'd tell him it's the orange or nothing ... reason being , what if the other two say that now they want something different .. and this will teach him that if he wants something different he must tell you before you cut it next time ...

Answer 8

I'd say take the orange and if you don't, you get nothing else.....

Not that it would be a big deal to get another fruit, it's the principle.

Answer 9

My mom always tells me pick my battles.but i always say do as i say.if I'm grumpy and not in the mood to negotiate I'll say eat or go hungry.

Answer 10

Well, I would say,wait,ill give u sthe apple for breakfest.But eat the orange now.Then the kid will know that he cant have the apple at the time.But he still gets his requisted snack!

Answer 11

well ask yourself a question, are you running a restaurant, its only a piece of fruit yes, but today its an orange tomorrow its a video game or a different bedtime. I would tell him to have the orange and he could have an apple tomorrow

Answer 12

I wouldn't give him the apple. If the kids were tired and cranky, I would give him his choice; orange or nothing at all. If he acted up, I would pick him up and tuck him into bed.

Answer 13

Honestly, its been a long day, you and the child are tired and as you said grumpy, you could make a point and make him eat the orange.. but he probably wont, he will throw a fit and make it an even more stressful and grumpy evening.  If it was my son id just give him an apple, therefor i know he isnt going to be hungry and i dont have to hear him cry for another hour... and if the 5 year old you are speaking of is anything like my 5 year old it would litterally be a long and stressful hour!  Over an ORANGE!! lol ahh kids, we need to teach them lessons and let them know they cant always be picky, but as you said they werent asked what they wanted, so it really isnt his fault, he wants apples, not oranges.  He wasnt asked his opinion and i think just this once he should be givin his way, if it isnt an everynight thing giving in once in a while will not hurt the child or make them think they can get away with anything, it will make him satisfied so you can all get to bed in peace.

Answer 14

I'd give him the option of the orange or something incredibly dull and boring (like toast or crackers).  I don't believe it is fair to deny a little one food, but I also don't think it is fair to be wasteful.  Since young children seem to respond better to a choice than being told "no" flat out, I often give my daughter the choice of what ever I was planning on offering or she can have a plain old dull cracker...some times she picks the cracker and that's fine by me.  This way her hunger is being satisfied and I don't feel like I've caved into her "demands".  Once they know you will bend over backwards and wait on them hand and foot they will begin to expect and demand that behaviour always.  Especially since you have 3 kids, you need to be the one controlling what is for snack (within reason), otherwise there will be a lot of wasted food...and who can afford that.

Answer 15

Tell him he can eat the orange and nothing else.

Answer 16

Nope orange or bed that would be the choice in my house.  It sounds like to me someone might have been trying to stay up longer . ;)  plus right before bed you shouldnt have to be short order "cook"

Kids are smart!

Answer 17

I would give him the orange or nothing at all. I don't have 3 kids but one thing leads to another then you're not only cutting up oranges (that no one is going to eat) then you have the jello, pudding, banana, and apple out too.

Answer 18

Same rule of thumb for children from the beginning to the end - make one thing for everyone, if you don't want it - you don't have to eat it - but that's it. They aren't going to DIE overnight if they don't eat their orange! After a while, there will be no fight - they'll know if they don't want an orange, they don't get anything. You are their mother, not their servant.

Tell him maybe you'll do apples tomorrow night.

Answer 19

give them a choice little kids that age likes the choice of things.  So cut up the apple and the orange and let them choose.  They will really think they are something if they get to do that.

Answer 20

well you should ask your children what they want so you won't cut an orange that they might not like, when you go to the grocery store, you should ask your children what they like to eat for snacks so your children would have many choices and they would not get tired of eating orange, it's also a good thing that you gave your children fruits instead of snacks

Answer 21

While giving the snack itself....give a choice of Apple or orange or grapes...just 2-3 (at max 4) choices and let them choose...

After selecting one if they want to change thier choice they can't ...just got to bed you can have new chance tommorrow and then may be you can select the other !

This makes the kids feal in control and they usually do not want to change since it was thier decision/choice...if they do and if you stick not giving them what they want later when they change they learn the consequence of not making the right decision !!

Something called as Positive decipline

Answer 22

SO sounds like my house several years ago, on days like that I would tell them you get what you get and dont throw a fit!

on a normal day they would get both with a glass of milk or goldfish and juice.

I plan to use the same approach with my now 6 month old son.

Answer 23

Depends how He asked for it did he ask for it or did he demand it if asked nice I would probably give it to him you have to pick your battles or you will lose your mind I know I have three too