Would you keep the baby?

Question

I posted this yesterday...

Me and my boyfriend called jake were both drunk at his house party. And i was talking to his best mate basically just telling him how much i loved Jake. Then Jake came over and asked us to follow him upstairs. Well he dragged me because i wanted to stay downstairs with everyone. Then all three of us went in the bedroom. I knew what was going to happen but i kept thinking it wouldn't. I said i wanted to go downstairs then he said no you don't. He took my clothes off and had s*x with my while his friend was there. I didn't want to i tried to stop him but i couldn't and for some reason i couldn't scream. Then while we were having s*x he was kissing his best mate. Then Jake kissed me and went downstairs shutting the door on his way out. His friend then tried to have s*x with me i tried to push him off but he held me down. He hit me as well. When he let go i just grabbed my stuff and went to the bathroom. I acted like nothing had happened when i went downstairs i felt ashamed and like a s**t. But i was thinking today did Jake know what his friend was going to do? I know that seems weird but why did he bring his friend with us and why did he leave us? I know i am probably over thinking this but i feel so disgusted in myself. And was i raped? I don't know what to do. What should i say to my boyfriend? I'm such a mess right now. I don't know if i am pregnant the next morning i was sick but that could be drink. Its all my fault. Help.

I may be pregnant. Would you keep the baby? I don't know what to do or what i want. I keep thinking that i cant cope with a baby but i feel like it will be killing an innocent baby. And i dont want to regret any decision. Please help. I am 17.

Answer 1

First of all you need to dump this loser. He obviously doesn't respect or care for you and you need to not waste your time on him. Second, it sounds a lot like date rape- even though you didn't scream the word 'no' he still got you drunk and took advantage of you and then tried to hand you off to another guy. Thats messed up. Third, It's too early to know if your pregnant- you must wait until you miss a period and then take a pregnancy test. And abortion is not the only answer if you are- there's always adoption and open adoption where you can still be a part of the baby's life. I would not worry about being pregnant right now because it is probably unlikely. You need to focus on leaving this guy- getting him outta your life (sounds like he's into his friend anyway). He took advantage of you and used you- you deserve better. Is there anyone you can talk about this with? Your parents, an older sibling cousin or aunt, or a school counselor? I would recommend doing so. I'm so sorry this happened to you. This is why it's so dangerous for young women to get drunk and do other drugs- they put you in a vulnerable situation and much worse things could have happened! I'm not trying to preach- I was 17 once too. But, you need to try and take better care of yourself. I know you trusted this guy, but please don't ever trust him again. No matter what he says to try and justify his actions.  

Answer 2

Sounds like Jake is bisexual with his friend and knew what was going to happen. You were definitely raped, you even stated you tried to stop him and didn't want to. You need to tell your parents, or tell the cops. Especially because if you are pregnant, you're not going to know which one of them is the father. It is natural to feel like it's your fault after you've been humiliated in such a way. I'm sure you'll go through a wide range of emotions and this is why it's very important you seek help. If Jake loved you he would have asked for your consent to do something like that. What he did was completely wrong and you need to realize that. Again, tell someone you can trust. And you definitely need to tell your parents if you can trust them. You'll want to go to a Dr and get checked for stds as well.

Try to stay strong. And don't stress about what to do about a baby you aren't sure you're pregnant with yet. Just take things one step at a time.

Tell someone. Tell the cops. Go to the Dr.  

Answer 3

YOU NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE ASAP!

PLEASE TELL YOUR PARENTS!

Answer 4

He forced you into s*x, kissed his friend while you where having s*x, left you naked with his friend knowing what was probably going to happen, and he is still your boyfriend?  You deserve better.  Also don't be drinking anymore.  Call a rape crises hot line and they can direct you to some help in dealing with this.  

Answer 5

You were most definitely raped and you need to tell your parents and the authorities immediately.  IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!  Get some help and support; you shouldn't have to go through this alone.  

As for abortion vs. adoption or keeping the baby, that is a decision that you and your family can make after you have had a couple of weeks to discuss with them the best options for you and your future.

I am sorry that this had to happen to you - just hang in there.

Answer 6

I'm sorry, but the last thing i would be calling that prick is a boyfriend. second don't worry about pregnancy at this point. You need to go to police and get these ***-holes charged for raping you.

Drunk or not, you said no and they didn't listen to you. Also, your "bf" new what he was doing when he left you with his friend, he knew d**n well what was going to happen, he didn't care.

go to the cops, go to your parents...don't let this slide!!!!!

Answer 7

Okay, try to calm down. Yes, you were raped and I believe Jake knew it was going to happen. You have nothing to feel ashamed about, but you should report it to the authorities.

Secondly you were sick the next morning from the drinks and I am sure about the stress of what happened to you. Morning sickness will not happen right away. If you do find out your pregnant, I believe you should give the baby up for adoption to any one of thousands of people seeking to adopt. Pleas don't kill an innocent baby.

Please do get help though

Answer 8

Yes it was rape.  Both guys are responsible in my book, since one stood by and watched while the other assaulted you.  Jake is NOT your boyfriend anymore--he is a criminal and you need to tell someone what they did.  They deserve to be punished for what they did to you and how they have made you feel.  You are NOT a s**t--you never asked for that to happen--it's NOT your fault.  Whether or not you are pregnant, you need to seek out an adult that you trust and report what has happened.  With support around you, you may be able to make more clear headed decisions.  Please don't let these jerks get away with what they did to you--I would never want them to ever do that to anyone els!

Answer 9

If you are for real, both your boyfriend and his friend raped you and you need to go to the police.  Drunk or not, if you said NO, you were raped.

If this happened within the last 48 hours, talk to a doctor right away and try to get a Plan B or other emergency contraception.  I'm not for abortion, but emergency contraception makes the egg unable to implant.  Long before there's a heartbeat or anything like that.

On another note, stop calling Jake your boyfriend.  He raped you.  

And don't drink anymore.  While it's not your fault they raped you if you said no, you might have had more sense or faster reflexes to get out of the room instead of letting Jake undress you.  You also may have been able to get out of the room when Jake left before his friend got on you.

Answer 10

You need to go talk to a sexual assault counselor.  Yes, you were raped if this really happened the way you say it did. And don't call him your boyfriend anymore, he is scum and does not deserve that title.  Yes, he knew what his friend was going to do, and he doesn't care about you the way a boyfriend should; he raped you.  Please talk to someone and seek professional help.  these kinds of things can cause serious emotional problems if ignored.  

Answer 11

first of all...take a deep breath...

second...this is in no way possible YOUR fault, so dont even think about blaming yourself. you need to stay far away from these guys and talk to your parent or some kind of adult figure you trust ASAP. they will help you through this. please dont blame yourself and end up doing nothing about it...please talk to someone  

Answer 12

YOU WERE RAPED!!! BY THEM BOTH!!! talk to your parents and file a police report today before you lose your time frame. You need to charge them with the crime just think they could do this to someone else and if that dont bother you if rape vic. keep hiding it it will happen to your daughter. Your parents will be understanding. As for the choice if you are. thats up to you and you need to talk to your parents about how you feel and why. I dont believe in abortion except for rape vics. it was not your choice, if you keep it you will have to live everyday when you look at the face and see your rape and rapist if you abort it (and seeing what you said) you will feel like you killed your child for the wrong reason. Talk to your parents and call the police!!!!

Answer 13

What you just desribed was rape. You need to see a doctor as soon as possible and get help. See a counsellor.

Answer 14

If this is all true, you really need to seek professional counseling.

Strangers over the internet aren't going to be much help in a situation as serious as this.

I urge you to get help, and then make an informed decision.

I wish you the best of luck

Answer 15

Yes you were rape.  TALK  TO YOUR PARENTS ASAP they are the only ones who can help you.

GOOD LUCK!!!

Answer 16

yes the BOTH Raped you!!!  Your b/f date raped you and his friend raped you because you tried to stop them both!!!  Press charges with both of them and never associate with him again!!!!  Also if you are pregnant it's your choice.  If you don't want to face a child that was a result of this horrible night, you can always give him up for adoption.  I am sorry this happened to you.  Best of luck.

Answer 17

If this really happened, then yes, you were raped. Tell your parents and call the police. Your mom and dad can help you figure out where to go from there, but please, tell someone.  

Answer 18

If everything is true then yes you were raped. yes jake knew his friend was going to rape you as well. is it too late for the morning after pill? that would have been your best option. if it is too late speak with your parents, either way you need to let them know what happened, but they will help you decide if you should keep the baby or not. if this just happened recently you may not be pregnant, cross your fingers & hope to god your not!

if you do end up pregnant, adoption may be the best answer. you wouldnt be killing an innocent baby, and you'd be giving someone who can't have a baby then most precious gift in the world.

best of luck

Answer 19

I hope your question is real, and if it is I feel really bad for you and yes, you should keep the baby. However I am skeptical because one week ago you were askin what to wear for your sweet and now you are 17. Please if this is real, contact me, I counsel young girls and would love to talk to you. If it isn't real or you just made a mistake, please correct it.