Would you leave your child with someone you had not met?

Question

I put an add on craigslist for another child to babysit. I am licensed and I used to be a CPS worker and the mother who responded knows this. I personally, even knowing this, would have to meet the provider and see the environment my child would be in. SO anyway this lady...her kids are 2 and 4 and I guess shes in a predicament and is goign through a divorce and new in town and wants me to start watching her kids on Monday. I emailed her back and asked if she'd be available to meet this weekend. We'll see if she is.

My question is would you leave you child with someone you had never met? I would not under any circumstances (my son has been watched by my mother and mil only, he's 9 months). My husband does not hink it's odd and says I'm too uptight and overprotective.

Should I be leary of this woman's parenting or given her circumstances is this acceptable?

Answer 1

I watch children from craigslist too. I'm glad you will care for them

Answer 2

I wouldn't leave my child to someone that I haven't met.  Under no circumstance would I do that but some people feel that if you have a license then you must be ok.  People leave their kids to a child care agency and they seem to be fine with that.  You are just like a childcare agency and shouldn't worry about the mother's parenting skills.  I'm sure she is a great mum.  If you believe that you are capable of looking after kids that you haven't even met then everything should be fine.

Answer 3

Well, she may see you as a professional and therefore is not worried about it but even if I was putting my kids into daycare i'd want to see who it was first.

Answer 4

Now I'm only 15 so I might not be the best person to answer this, but I'd say what you're experiencing is normal, probably mothers protective instinct. My advice would be go with your gut feeling, if you aren't comfortable then don't. Perhaps use some of those nanny cams things, so you can watch the tapes later, provided it is at your house.

Answer 5

hmmm....take caution. i myself will not even leave my birds with someone i can't trust or don't know, and if i had children i would never ever never ever never leave them with a stranger especially someone from the internet....not even a thought. i guess times are changing but i still wouldn't do it....that is just myself.

if you want......have several meeting with her, play-dates with the kids and see if you get any odd vibes. the play-dates can be done in a public place to protect your privacy. take your time and screen her well. you can never be too cautious especially when dealing with people from the internet.

who knows it could end up being a wonderful thing.....go slowly and see how it goes.

best of luck hope it all works out.

Answer 6

Well granted I'm only 20 (almost 21) and don't intend on having kids.  But if I were to, I would have to say never in a million years.  It's to often you're hearing about a kid being killed at daycare from sticking his head under the sand, or a kid be abducted by a care taker.  

I gotta say, If I were the person I would need to be a 100% sure the person watching my kid is completly clean of any addictions and has never had any jail time.  

There's just to many wackos out there.  

Answer 7

I would never EVER leave my child with someone I had never met before.  I insist on seeing the environment that my child will be in, and plus I believe in mothers instinct, usually when you meet someone you get a vibe from them, one that you cant get through talking on the phone or through the internet. I'm glad to hear that she responded, because I would definitely question her parenting otherwise.

Answer 8

well I am confused here, You put the ad to babysit and then are surprised that someone answered it?

well you don't know, maybe this woman will come over with a bunch of questions and do a background check on you.  Hopefully she will.  But people drop off kids all the time tobabysitters.  I personally would have never left MY kids with anyone other then friends and family , but I was fortunate not to have too.  Some people aren't.  

Answer 9

Well, given her predicament, she doesn't have a lot of choice. Plus, she could have been waiting to see if Monday was acceptable to you, and then had asked for your references and to meet you over the weekend. She sounds like she's on a time crunch. You never know--she could've had a sitter say he/she would sit, then quit yesterday or today. You never know!  

Answer 10

not in a million years would I leave my son with someone I had not previously met in an environment I wasnt familiar with I would let the children come and watch them closly and watch the mother and how she interacts with them and all that she may just be more laid back than I am or more trusting of people in general but I would keep a close eye on the situation hope I helped  

Answer 11

I don't care what a person's circumstances are, the thought of someone leaving their child with a perfect stranger they found an AD ONLINE for is just negligent. It has NOTHING to do with you personally, but generally speaking because we live in a day and age when there are soooo many creeps out there, I can't believe anyone could be so naive and careless as this mother.

ANYONE could go online and say they have the purity and love of Mother Theresa when they could be as sick and warped as Jeffrey Dahmer. Sorry, but no, that's just ridiculous of that mother.

For me, with our three children, I have tons of family nearby, but there is only one person who is "approved" of to babysit for us, and it is only under VERY strict criterea. Aside from my mother in law, my husband (obviously) is the ONLY person I'll let watch my kids.

You can NOT be too careful with your children-they are precious and trust us to choose wisely for them.

Answer 12

2 things about this...me personally no..but i dont trust anyone with my kids..even most family members.

but i can see how she would feel about leaving them with you after seeing your references, past background with cps, ect. and its a good thing she is meeting you first and seeing how you are personally/professionally, how you are with her kids, ect. i wouldnt look at her parenting skills as bad, but a lady in need.  sometimes as a parent you get into situations where you just have to go with what you got, do what you have to do and the only thing to do is keep a watch on whoever is watching your children and look for signs of abuse.

dont judge so quickly until you have met her and you may be surprised.

edit.. also as the person below me stated..if you take your child to a daycare.its basically the same thing...they are still strangers even if you see them work with kids, the enviroment, and having talks with them.  but also look at how many kids get abused at them without knowing..and you also have to look at how many GREAT daycares you are...the point being..you never know..and you just have to watch and look for signs in the meantime.

Answer 13

That is a hard situation what the mother is going thro, but she is putting her trust with you in your hands of her precious baby. Does it make a difference if I drop my son off at a home private care not knowing the workers, but they have a  CPS?

It is hard at times as a mother to face situations like these,

I put a add on nannieshire.com and within 2 days a family wanted to hire me right away. I am more than qualified to be a nanny, but the family did not ask me any experince of my work or they werent intrested if I had a crp/first aide (witch I do) and I did not accept the job.

Just meet the women and take it from there from...  

From my exprience - if this womn does not ask for refernces, certificates, look into police record of your than she has every right to put her child in your hands - as she would at a day care...

Answer 14

As a home daycare worker myself... I think this is odd.  I personally would not leave my child with someone I had never met.  I would probably have a hard time leaving him with someone I didn't know even if I have had 15 interviews/meeting with them... that is why I decided to stay home with my son and look after other kids.  But, obviously not everyone can do this or would want to do this.  

Also, I need to meet the children/families of the kids I am looking after.  It is not only their choice to leave their kids in your care... but, you also have a say if you want to look after their kids.

Having a meeting/interview helps to get a feel for the kids and the family... and parenting skills.

Most of the time when there are problems... it is the parents that are the biggest issue - not the kids.

Hopefully this lady will have time to meet with you this weekend... if not I hope you feel confident with your choice and that you have a great contract to fall back on... pre-payment, and a clause saying either party can back out in the first two weeks- no questions asked... (this covers you if the kids are a HUGE handful... or cry the whole time they are there.)

All the best!

Answer 15

Ah,,,,, NEVER!!! ARE YOU NUTS?????

Answer 16

I have 2 boys a 4 yr old and 16 month old. And I would have to agree i would never leave my boys not even my 4 yr old with someone or in a place that i have never been 2. You just know matter the circumstances can not trust anyone, not even some family members would I trust. I mean even mothers make their kids disappear, imagine strangers people that do are not related to your children.  Now maybe she has done some type of background check on you, who knows.

I just love my boys to much,

Hope this helps!

Answer 17

it sounds kind of suspicious that she doesn't care to meet you first, you might be getting yourself into a bad situation..My daughter has never been left with anyone but my husband..and I didn't even want to leave her then..

if it were me, I probably wouldn't babysit them, their mother might be on drugs or something..and what if you get mixed in something you don't want to be mixed in?

anyway, good luck!

Answer 18

I wouldn't do it but I have babysat for people that didnt' know me at all.  I put an ad on babysitters.com once and a woman responded, she needed a babysitter for a few hours on saturday so she and her husband could go out.  They had a 6 month old and a 4 year old.  I agreed to babysit and she showed up that weekend with the kids and their diaper bag and stuff.  She gave me the contact info and allergy info and then they left and came back at 2 am.  She paid me $75 for the night and then said thanks and they were gone.  She just had a last minute thing to go to and no babysitter, it was so weird.  Luckily her kids and I got along great but still i felt weird that this couple was willing to let a total stranger watch their kids like that especially such a small baby.  

Answer 19

No never, especially an infant. If i were to get someone off a site i would have to have them around me a few times and see how well they are with my children before i ever ever allow them around my kids!

Answer 20

h**l NO! I would never leave my child with anyone I have not met before and have not inspected to make sure they are up to my satisfactions!

Answer 21

well i personally wouldn't but i suppose there could be extreme circumstances that may necessitate it, i wouldn't judge her harshly she could just be in a tight spot

Answer 22

NEVER! NEVER LEAVE YOUR CHILD WITH SOMEONE YOU DO NOT KNOW! It could be someone posting as a nice lady and end up a fat old man that wants to abuse your child. Never trust people found on the internet. Always meet the person first, and watch maybe for a day what they do.