Would you leave your husband if he you caught him talking on his cell with female co-worker?

Question

If you had kids and married for 11 years what would you do if you came across the cell bills and found a female co-worker's number on it about 300 times within 2 months? Would you leave him or try to work it out even if he was remorsefuly sorry. Would you believe him if he said nothing happened, just talking? Even if he didn't go out at night and just came straight home after work? Can anyone find time to cheat in a physical way if you're at an office job with tons of others cubicles there?

Answer 1

I think ending a marriage over this is a bit OVER KILL and over reacting - throwing out the baby with the bath water mistake if you ask me!  BUT I would lay down some rules with his phone, about HER, maybe YOU need to see the cell phone bill every month yourself - mine lists EVERY CALL MADE.  Maybe he needs to be a little more accountable for himself with his time and activities until he proves he is trustworthy again. HE should be willing to do this for your sake.  IF he is gonna cheat it will happen eventually - so give him the chance to sincerely prove otherwise first before you CHUCK the whole marriage - that's a bit extreme I think

Answer 2

i would want proof that he did more than talk. 300 times in 2 months, thats alot. more than needed, in my opinion, but maybe not enough to justify a divorce. do you know the female? maybe you should get to know her, if you dont. if nothings going on, he shouldnt have a problem!

Answer 3

I would try to work through it. This is issue comes up in the best of marriages. It's all a matter of how you handle it. Tell him that he is no longer allowed to speak with her outside of work, and if he does it again, thats it.

Might tell him to start looking for another job.  

Answer 4

My nosy wife had a fit after she found 2 text messages and 2 phone calls from my lovely assistant.  Now we no longer use the cell phone to communicate.  Hard lines are harder to record and trace without my knowing it.  Sad to say we are still having fun, just being more cautious about leaving bread crumbs behind.  

Answer 5

are you controlling?!!

he sounds like he has a friend. is there any other reason to believe hes having an affair other then the phone calls/texts?

does he have time gaps between work? does he eat lunch with her?

Answer 6

Sounds fishy to me.  Something is def going on.  There are always times and places to sneak away to.

Answer 7

They can find time to cheat during lunch so it's not impossible.  You have to decide what's best for you because if it were me, I would leave him.  Cheating is something I won't tolerate in a marriage.

Answer 8

an emotional affair is still cheating, if nothing happened yet, it probably will eventually. Can you work it out? That's up to the two of you. I would go get tested for stds, he may have brought home more than he was bargaining for.....

Answer 9

Well I would ask him what need is getting filled with all this talking...

it is possible that you aren't as sweet as you once were, or maybe now that there are kids and bills to pay etc, you don't give him the attention he craves....

I'm just saying, if you want the marriage to be back on good standing, find out WHY he's doing this and see if there is anything you can do to make things better.

Answer 10

It's not exactly hard to get out of work for a while.  He has an hour for lunch, right?  My bosses always let me leave if I said I had a doctor's appointment or whatever.  I was never doing anything wrong but it's pretty easy to get out of work when you really want to.

Answer 11

Sure, it's called lunch time!  A lot can happen on those hour lunches.  Sorry, but it's true.  300 calls in two months is an awfully lot for people who are co-workers. Can't they chit chat at work?  If he's sorry then he must have done something he shouldn't have.

Answer 12

If I found over 300 calls on hubby's cell to a female coworker, I'm afraid that I wouldn't be understanding and accept that there wasn't anything going on between them.  He's married, so he has no reason to talk to a female PERIOD that many times.  Once or twice, maybe written off as shop talk, but 300 times?  Uh uh!  If he's wanting to cheat, he'll find a way!  There are broom closets in offices...they're acceptable and have been known to be the place to 'do the deed.'  How do you know he's coming straight home after work?

Girl, we'd do some serious talking!  My cell phones are in my name, so hubby wouldn't have a cell anymore!

God bless you and yours...Always!

Answer 13

the answer is yes . my s..t  co worker ( married with 3 kids )used to kiss and have s*x in elevators , bathrooms , mother's room , parking lot . you name it her *** was there . thank god she got fired cause she disgusted me everytime i saw her.

anyway if he said nothing happened it is probably not true but that is not what matters most . if he is terribly sorry and sure he wont do it again then put some work in it . well it depends if you want to but think about yur kids and the time you ve spent married to each other . while it shouldnt  be tolerated for spouses to cheat , i still believe a marriage can survive if both of you want to . people have . it depends on both of you . men are full of **** but i couldnt still live without one .  

Answer 14

Ive been with my husband for 11 years, and we have kids too.  If mine did something like that I would definitely leave.  What (or who) do you think he is doing on his lunch break?  Sorry.