Would you let your Boyfriend live with you and not pay any bills?

Question

Would you let your boyfriend live with you for 4 years and him not pay any bills. His kids come over every other weekend and hardly ever goes to the food store and buy stuff for the weekend. he may help out about $1000 over the past 4 years. I told him we should live with each other any more because he can't help pay any bills. Is this wrong of me to break up with someone over money?

Answer 1

Money isn't everything but this guy is a leech.  I agree that you either have to get him to agree to pay a reasonable amount towards the expenses or leave.  4 years is to long for this he should be pulling his weight by now, even if he can't afford to help out he should've gotten a job by now and done what he can.

Answer 2

HECK NO! u should a broken up wit him a long time ago!!

  hes jus takin advantage of u gurl! u knt keep babyin him like dis no offense... u did good u did good i know u might feel bad @ first but know dat u did d rite thin cuz  i mean HIS kids came over! and u were d 1 dat payed d food bills dats jus unfair fo u! $1000 for 4 years? no way im sure d expenses were alot more.....d rite & just thin was for him 2 b pullin his own weight or at least hav helped alot more cuz after all u BOTH ate u BOTH used electricity u BOTH used gas. my point is he had 2 hav helped mor..........

=P  

Answer 3

No !   unless    you  have  lots  of  $$$$  and  you  are  going  to  allow  him to  use  you  and  have  an  understanding  that  he  lives  there  for   FREE ,...................I  don't  even  have  a  BOYFRIEND  he,he,he......  TALK  and  SAY  what  is  in  your  HEART.............................It  is  not  about  the  $$$$$$$$

but  the  principles     DANG !!!!   4 YEARS???????

  You  are  KIND  I  give  you  that,....SPEAK

Answer 4

No, is not wrong, actuallyyou are teaching him something, he was using you, because most of thr guys help their couples with the bills.

And yeah maybe it sounds wrong to leave someone for money but is not just about love, sometimes money is important too, you cant pay bills with love.

Answer 5

I think spending 4 years with this guy was 3 years and 11 months too long.

I hope you do not have kids together and if not, don't have them.

This relationship is recipe for financial disaster for YOU!

I would end the relationship altogether  because having him move out will create uneasy feeling for the both of you afterwards.

If he has not learned to contribute the to relationship for the last 4 years, he never will.

If you have kids with this person, and it doesn't work out, you could end paying HIM for child support.

I hear Dr. Laura talk about this a lot. "What you have is a boy, not a man."

http://www.drlaura.com/main/

You need someone responsible enough to take care of himself, his kids and his responsibilities, and not depend on you to this this for him.

The #3 reason why people break from a marriage is for financial reasons. (#1 is sexual incompatibility,  #2 Ineffective communication).

It may not be easy, but you have to do this for your future sanity.

Good Luck!

Answer 6

This man sounds like a loser.  If he has more than one child, he should be much more mature and responsible and know how to hold down a job and make money.  It'll be tough, but you'll have to hold firm and get him out of your house if you are dissatisfied and want to move on with your life.

Answer 7

Either he pays or he moves out. What is he contributing, nothing. Are you so desperate to put up with this? Obviously it bothers you that he is not paying his fair share.    

Answer 8

I give up.  What reason could he possibly be giving for this?

Answer 9

Do you love him....?

Can you afford to continue to support him...?

Does he take care of the house.........?

There are couples who have such role reversals....where the wife is the bread winner and the man says home with the kids and takes care of the house.   You don't mention such things.

Do you enjoy taking care of a man or would you prefer to have a man contribute to the household  and take care of you.

I would kick him to the curb and find a real man.  

Answer 10

Its your choice. It isn't wrong.

Answer 11

Forest Gump once said: Life is like a box of chocolates, you have lots to chose from.

The analogy is that you can decide whether or not to pay for your free loading boyfriend.  He should start paying up "immediately" of get the "f" out!  He is a leach, unless of course he has a handy cap and is unable to work, however, I'm sure you would have mentioned if he was.

He is definitely using you.  You are a good "Mark".

Answer 12

It isn't wrong. You're footing the bills while he's living virtually free. If he can't help you with the bills, what's his purpose? Especially cuz his kids come over too.  

Answer 13

h**l NO!  Not in this lifetime!

Answer 14

It is wrong to wait this long to get rid of the deadbeat.

He is using you. Cut him loose, you have nothing to gain from this relationship.