Would you like to give me some comments on this?

Question

It's a poem I wrote two years ago...but like many of my poems, this one too has never been red by anybody. Now, I would like to hear your oppinion...

I fade into the eternity

And the eternity is growing,

I drown into darkness

And the darkness is falling.

I went in that love’s fire

And the fire has burned me,

I sank into your bright eyes

And they in your slave have turned me

***

you’re consuming me slowly

and feeding my grief

you’re living me empty

I have nothing to believe in…

You’re killing my sad eyes,

And poisoning my tears,

You’re diving me pain

And making stronger my fears

***

I tried to be different

Tried to kill this love

But I was pushed by the evil

That came from above,

Punished for not being guilty

Young and innocent nailed to a cross

Murdered by that fallen angel

In this pale part of the universe I’m lost

Answer 1

I like your poem very much. Keep on writing! Could you have a look at this please?  http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...