Would you start a relationship with someone knowing..?

Question

Could you be in a relationship with someone that had a child knowing that you would never be your partners number 1 love or priority because of their child?

Answer 1

I'm a grownup, so I have no need to be #1 in my partner's life.

Answer 2

that sounds kind of selfish. She would make time for you but she is in charge of someones life and that is a huge responsibility that your gonna have to deal with.

Answer 3

Even if they were your kids you would always be number 2 anyway. But being number 2 isn't so bad if it's a good number 2. You can't compete with children, you just can't, the love of children and the love of a partner are two completely different things. Good luck and don't be put out by that.

Answer 4

My partner has 2 children and I love them both dearly.  I would never expect or even want her to put me above them....that would be very selfish : )

Answer 5

i would. just because her child is a big important part of her life, that doesnt mean they wont love you. they will love you both equally just in different ways.

Answer 6

Well, you must understand that a child is something so precious to their mother. I am a mother myself, though I am married to her father, my daughter is my number 1 priority...There is nothing you can do about that. Her children will be first but you will be next...If you don't think you will be able to accept it, then don't pursue the relationship further if you think you will be jealous of her children.  

Answer 7

well i dont think thats true ... i mean think about it  lets say you do hook up with her and you decide to have kids wouldnt that put you in the same situation???

Answer 8

A person's child always comes first, in most relationships, at least if that person is a good parent.

My parents are the same way, My mom loves my Dad but I know that I am still number one in her life.

Just because their child is number one, doesnt mean that they don't have enough love to go around.

Answer 9

Why are people being so mean?  I understand your question and, hey people, everybody gets to make their own choices.

Some people could accept that, others couldn't.  I had a similar issue when I dated a guy who had a twin brother.  No matter how close we got, I was always second to his brother, which is natural, because face it, they were a single cell at one time!  But it was hard for me to know that, say, we were both drowning and he could only save one of us, he would save his brother (hypothetically.)

So it comes down, can you accept being a close runner up or is 2nd best not good enough?  The answer is different for everyone and there's no right or wrong.  For me, it would be too difficult to not be first.  I don't think it's selfish, it's just the way it.

Answer 10

If I knew that a person felt that way about my children. I wouldn't get involved with them because my children if I had children would be my number 1 priority. Bf's come and go but your children is yours for life. So a boyfriend or girlfriend can't expect for their lovers to put them first. You make time for the two of you when necessary though.

The only reason I probably wouldn't get with a person with children is because I wouldn't want to be responsible for a child. I don't want to have to babysit over nobody.  

Answer 11

My wife has a son, & we treat him as if her were both of ours & we are both 2nd to him.

Answer 12

lady...u need to get over urself.

those kids are her blood...

you on the other hand are just an infatuation...and totally selfish...u dont need to be anyone's #1 if u can't understand that someone's child/children should come first...

i have seen all too often people put their significant others (whether it be str8 or homo) and it messes the kids up...

its called unconditional love for the kids... her kids will always be there...if ur just a gf for some time...u aren't a constant part of her life...... and if it would be hard for you step the h**l on...

ur too immature for a woman with 2 kids if u think that u should be the center of her world wen she has 2 children that by birth hold that right.

----

btw i dont have any kids...