Would you to read my short-story?

Question

I wrote this last week. It is based on some vivid childhood memories. I don't know how good it is. I realize there is a simplicity to the writing, but I think it comes from the fact that I am remembering things from a child's perspective. I would appreciate your thoughts on it.

It is called "Mud Pies and Witches".

http://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1396889

Answer 1

when is coming out becaus i whoud love to read it .

Answer 2

This was absolutely precious, and with a lot more meaning than probably most give it at a cursory glance. The underlying moral is one that we hear every single day, but we can always stand to hear it again, because we always forget it. C'est la vie, no? But the way it's written, from someone who as they reminisce fall back into the days of childhood grandeur with explicit detail drawn out as only the adult mind can remember, as only the child can explain. It was a beautiful rendering where memory meets fantasy and reality is defined by perception. I especially love the climax of the story, the approach of the "witch" and the way that our heroine realizes in reality, as in the dream, "I must have made a mistake." Never judge a book by their cover. I thoroughly enjoyed this. Blessed Be.

Answer 3

I enjoyed it!  i have a website that i am looking for people to post their work and share with other people check it out!.

Answer 4

i thought the body of your story was pretty good. it reminded me of the simplicity and innocence fo childhood. but your introduction didn't really stand out as much as your story did. maybe try starting in your room and describing it, then move onto descibe your apartment complex or something. i don't know, just ideas.