Would you trust him again? keeps getting caught lying...?

Question

My partner has only just recently told me that the things he has done with previous partners... well to a point he only tells what he wants....understandable...

But he has told me all these things like i was his first for this and that and that He's never done that with anyone else. Now he's forgetting heaps of stuff he's already confessed to....

But now we are moving and i have just found more letters and more girl's house directions and the last possible train times and i just feel like with what these girls are writing to him ... he's not well as he has made out. He even said to me last night ok.. i've been 99% honest with you... and i'm like... ok... what else was the lie...?

I feel like i've been totally conned and scammed by him. I have decided to not have s*x with him anymore. Bad idea i know.... but every time he touches me i feel like he's this dirty liar who is using me ... but here's the catch... he loves me and 'couldn't live without you' So i'm like ok, Their all from before... i'm over them,,,

but how do i get over the man i love and father of my daughter is lieing about something so special and intimate to me?

How do i ever let him touch me again? Intimately without feeling sick?

Answer 1

If that is the way you feel, then I think it's time for you to sit him down, tell him how you feel and then tell him it is over between the two of you. You can't continue in a relationship like this. It is not healthy for you to keep wondering if he is telling you the truth or not. Best of luck to you.

Answer 2

once a liar always a liar, you shouldn't stay with a man when he's treating you so badly for the sake of your child. Your gonna end up arguing all the time about his lies and it will only affect your child badly seeing it all anyway. If you are confident you can work it out and he can stop the lies then only time will tell if you can forgive him - but it will never be how it was. I'm not saying he doesn't love you but when you love someone you don't want to hurt them, but he is.  Also the whole ' i cant live without you thing' is just him telling you what you want to hear and kind of a guilt trip. You have two choices stay with him and tell him you want the lies and everything else to stop or your gonna leave him - but this could mean a waste of time and more confusion and hurt for you and your child. The second option is simple leave him now if deep down you really don't think he will change. It's down to you obviously what you do but even if a relationship starts off great, the second a man starts treating you badly its not a one off mistake, its him showing you who he really is.

good luck.x

Answer 3

You need to be stronger, although it's very hard. Anyway, it is true that love cannot go on with lie. As I read your story, if you love him, you may give him a chance, but also tell yourself (you can also tell him if you want) this is the last chance you can offer.

During this period, you should avoid seeing him, it will help you to recover quicker. It will be even better to spend more times with your daughter.

Once you get better and ready to be with him, all you need to do is to act normally. You do not need to monitor him, just trust him. And if that kind of thing happens again, I am sure that you will be able to make a decision easier. Good luck.