You're life as a cigarette?

Question

write a few lines of your life as a cigarette ...

Answer 1

my insides are picked off a field, dried to a crisp.

They stuff my paper skin with a cotton filter and the dried leaves picked off the fields.

i am packaged and sent off to the local corner store, and await to be consumed by a person foolish enough to inhale my toxic breath.

Answer 2

It all started when our hyphen-happy protagonist, Cigarette boy, woke up in a disease-infested jungle. It was the first time it had happened. Feeling scarcely frustrated, Cigarette boy backhanded a wolverine, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). With fist clenched and teeth gnashed, he realized that his beloved shrunken head was missing!  Immediately he called his former lay, Micheal Jackson. Cigarette boy had known Micheal Jackson for (plus or minus) 2,000 years, the majority of which were saucy ones.  Micheal Jackson was unique. He was intelligent though sometimes a little... oafish. Cigarette boy called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

   Micheal Jackson picked up to a very angry Cigarette boy. Micheal Jackson calmly assured him that most legless puppies panic before mating, yet man-eating capybaras usually indiscriminately belch *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Cigarette boy.  Why was Micheal Jackson trying to distract Cigarette boy?  Because he had snuck out from Cigarette boy's with the shrunken head only two days prior.  It was a enticing little shrunken head... how could he resist?

   It didn't take long before Cigarette boy got back to the subject at hand: his shrunken head. Micheal Jackson turned red. Relunctantly, Micheal Jackson invited him over, assuring him they'd find the shrunken head. Cigarette boy grabbed his time machine and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Micheal Jackson realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the shrunken head and he had to do it carefully. He figured that if Cigarette boy took the curb-jumping ghetto sled (Impala), he had take at least two minutes before Cigarette boy would get there.  But if he took the DeLorean DMC-12?  Then Micheal Jackson would be really screwed.

   Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Micheal Jackson was interrupted by ten abrasive Llamas that were lured by his shrunken head. Micheal Jackson panicked; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling displeased, he skillfully reached for his ninja star and aimlessly backhanded every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the swamp, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief.  That's when he heard the DeLorean DMC-12 rolling up.  It was Cigarette boy.

----o0o----

   As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Jim's House of Wings to pick up a 12-pack of wolverines, so he knew he was running late.  With a skillful leap, Cigarette boy was out of the DeLorean DMC-12 and went exotically jaunting toward Micheal Jackson's front door.  Meanwhile inside,  Micheal Jackson was panicking.  Not thinking, he tossed the shrunken head into a box of dull pencils and then slid the box behind his elephant. Micheal Jackson was displeased but at least the shrunken head was concealed.  The doorbell rang.

   'Come in,' Micheal Jackson exotically purred.  With a apt push, Cigarette boy opened the door.  'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some insensitive social outcast in a spaceship,' he lied.  'It's fine,' Micheal Jackson assured him. Cigarette boy took a seat ridiculously far from where Micheal Jackson had hidden the shrunken head. Micheal Jackson yawned trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness.  'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted.  But Cigarette boy was distracted. With fist clenched and teeth gnashed, Micheal Jackson noticed a annoying look on Cigarette boy's face. Cigarette boy slowly opened his mouth to speak.

   '...What's that smell?'

   Micheal Jackson felt a stabbing pain in his shin when Cigarette boy asked this.  In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the shrunken head right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what?  I don't smell anything..!'  A lie.  A selfish look started to form on Cigarette boy's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's carrots from when she used to have pet disease-carrying chipmunks.  She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Cigarette boy nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Micheal Jackson could react, Cigarette boy randomly lunged toward the box and opened it.  The shrunken head was plainly in view.

   Cigarette boy stared at Micheal Jackson for what what must've been four hours. A few freaknasty minutes later, Micheal Jackson groped earnestly in Cigarette boy's direction, clearly desperate. Cigarette boy grabbed the shrunken head and bolted for the door.  It was locked. Micheal Jackson let out a eccentric chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Cigarette boy,' he rebuked. Micheal Jackson always had been a little clueless, so Cigarette boy knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Micheal Jackson did something crazy, like... start chucking ninja stars at him or something. A few freaknasty minutes later, he gripped his shrunken head tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

   Micheal Jackson looked on, blankly. 'What the h**l?  That seemed excessive.  The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Cigarette boy. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame eleven days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Cigarette boy. 'Oh.  You ..okay?' Still silence. Micheal Jackson walked over to the window and looked down. Cigarette boy was gone.

----o0o----

   Just yonder, Cigarette boy was struggling to make his way through the haunted thicket behind Micheal Jackson's place. Cigarette boy had severely hurt his armpit during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength.  Another pack of feral Llamas suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the shrunken head.  One by one they latched on to Cigarette boy.  Already weakened from his injury, Cigarette boy yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed.  The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Llamas running off with his shrunken head.

   About five hours later, Cigarette boy awoke, his shin throbbing.  It was dark and Cigarette boy did not know where he was.  Deep in the arid secret vineyard, Cigarette boy was barely lost. With fist clenched and teeth gnashed, he remembered that his shrunken head was taken by the Llamas. But at that point, he was just thankful for his life.  That's when, to his horror, a misshapen Llama emerged from the foxy forest.  It was the alpha Llama. Cigarette boy opened his mouth to scream but was cut short when the Llama sunk its teeth into Cigarette boy's scalp. With a faint groan, the life escaped from Cigarette boy's lungs, but not before he realized that he was a failure.

   Less than five miles away, Micheal Jackson was entombed by anguish over the loss of the shrunken head.  'MY PRECIOUS!!' he cried, as he reached for a sharpened ninja star.  With a quick thrust, he buried it deeply into his taint.  As the room began to fade to black, he thought about Cigarette boy... wishing he had found the courage to tell him that he loved him.  But he would die alone that day.  All that remained was the shrunken head that had turned them against each other, ultimately causing their demise.  And as the dew on melancholy sappling branches began to reflect the dawn's reddish glare, all that could be heard was the chilling cry of distant Llamas, desecrating all things sacred to virtuous men, and perpetuating an evil that would reign for centuries to come.  Our heroes would've lived unhappily ever after, but they were too busy being dead.  So, no one lived forever after, the end. :'(

Answer 3

My skin is so white mostly, I wish I could get tan all over! (haha is it ok if i laugh at myself!)

I think I look harmless - but I just feel toxic inside.

I think my themetune should be 'Love me or hate me' - you should see the hatred in some people's eyes when they look at me, and the longing in others' eyes!

I just feel really sad 'cuz I know I'll have vanished forever very soon :( and all my roommates too!!!!

Answer 4

my life as a cigarette i don't smoke and

i wouldn't either if i were one id be sick

and my life would end as soon as i went out

Answer 5

why on earth would someone do that ?

plus, since this is homework help or w/e

no one is gnna do yer homework kidd.

Answer 6

snuggled at home with my brothers and sisters, we lie buried and forgotten in the darkness of the womb. The days turn to weeks, then to months, as we sit together but forgotten. We talk to each other to pass the time. Finally, the harsh reality of daylight breaks into our home. Wait. NO! Don't take my brother! What did he ever do to you?!? I can hear his screams as he is slowly burned alive. What kind of cruel soul could stand to do this?!? Oh, no. They are reaching for me next...

Answer 7

Is this homework? Hahaha.

Getting pulled out of a pack, getting lit on fire, people puffing on you, smoke everywhere, until you get smashed into the ground and get blown away by the wind.

That's pretty much the life of a cigarette.

Answer 8

well first its useless without being lit.

once lit, depending on how much work is being done on it (inhaling) the hotter and faster it burns.

it needs to be held.

it cant do it buy itself unless it is lit.

once to the buttt....ur done dude.

Answer 9

Short and hot...:)

Answer 10

i lived in a pack with my family. some dude pulled me away from them after he smoked my brother and my sister and my mom. i found myself being a much shorter square, butt of a man , lying in a beer bottle.  

Answer 11

I feel like I'm burning all day long.