Young V Old Who do you think make the best parents?

Question

I get sick of hearing how useless young parents are, I believe age is irrelevant you are either a good parent or a bad parent, I know several young parents (I am talking under the age of twenty) who are without doubt amazing and do their job very well, I also know some parents who had their children in their late 40's and are the worst parents I have ever seen. What are your views and experiences on this?

Answer 1

The ones with the most patience.

I too know young parents that have coped brilliantly. And the ones that have left it late seem to cope the least, they are already set in their ways and find the adjustments to their life hard. I'm not saying they're bad parents tho.

Answer 2

everyone is different, age is nothing but a number!  

Answer 3

First off I agree with a lot of the comments here age is irrelevant.  As for bleeding the government dry?  WIC is an awesome program that benefits mothers of income brackets.  

Answer 4

Age is irrelevant. Its how you cope as a parent. I fell pregnant at 19. Everybody was like you are not going to cope, you are way to young. I will be to selfish and will not want to sacrifice anything for my baby. It really got me down. It did make me doubt myself about becoming a parent and if I could take on the responsibility. When my son was born it was the best day of my life. My partner and I love our son to bits. He is a happy toddler. I know I am good mum, I don't need people telling me because of my age I won't make a good mum. However what I have learnt is that the only person that can tell you,  you are a good mum, is your child! Sounds crazy but true. When your child is happy and secure within themselves..that's proof you are doing a good job! Also just to add..My partner and I both work,  we are getting married in a few weeks..I start uni next month....we haven't  bled the goverment dry!

Answer 5

I'm an 'old' parent - I had my 1st at 37, 2nd at 41 and 3rd at 45.  Not really wanting it to work out that way but it did and I am very lucky and blessed.

I personally am a much better parent at this age than I would have been in my teens, 20's and much of my 30's.  Not that I was a bad person but I just didn't have the right mindset for it then.  I'm sure I would have had less patience and less foresight than I do now.  

So for me, I am a better parent being older.  Age does have an affect on you and you do learn from experience.   In my opinion, I would think that more experience in life makes you better prepared to be a parent.  

However, there is truly no age limit on being able to love and care for a child so I would say age is irrelevant on that level.  

Answer 6

well I can maybe help answer this question!!! I had my first kid at 19 (young) and I think I was too immature looking back on it now but I didnt neglect her and I well looked after her I went onto have other children right up until last year when I had my little boy Im now 41 but a young 41  lol my partner is 20! I think 41 is just a bit too old for a baby now or maybe Ive just had enough and need me time! I thought the best age was in my 30`s I was so relaxed and chilled it was great I dont think there is an age for having a baby to be honest, its how the individual feels themself and what they want out of life!

Answer 7

It all depends on what you mean by " best" parents.  This is very broad here.,

You can;t say ALL or NONE here.  True some are not the sterotype.  

From my experience with teen Parents.( not sterotyping here, this is from experience)

1. Most teen Moms although can change diapers and feed children,they lack the ability to teach other necessary things to children such as but not limited to: manners, values and do not have the maturity to handle situations with children as well.

2. Most teens depend on their own parents to help with the children, lesson their ability to parent themselves.

3. Most teens are not financially stable to support children, therefore they are on welfare, food stamps, WIC, and other government assistance, therefore bleeding out the system.

4. Most teens are not able to finish out education, therefore not being educated enough to get out of poverty after having a child.

5. Most teens will resent the fact that they missed out on young adult years and therefore try to spend the rest of their parent years, grabbing that back.

6. Most teen girls will not be with the same partner they concieved with, therefore they will be single parents.  

Older parents Usually are more stable both maturally and financially.

Most older parents are married and or able to support their children.These are just statistics here. Thats all.   This is what reports say and my experience with teen Moms.  

That is not to say that some are not wonderful parents.

Answer 8

young parents can make very good parents. I had both of my girls by 20 and i think im a pretty good mom. its just harder because of things like money and trying to still balance time so that you can still be a kid sometimes. Its REALLY hard but young parents can make good parents.

Answer 9

Of course there are always exceptions and wanting children is obviously the best characteristic.  BUT I think young parents have more energy to have fun with and discipline the children properly so they turn out to be great adults.

Answer 10

Its the individual person not the age that counts.  There are plenty of useless parents at 40 as there are at 18.  

Those ones that dont believe in discipline and want to treat their five year olds as their equals are the worst.  Their kids are always rude brats.

Answer 11

Parents should not be too old and not too young. They should have finished school and learned something.. Finished their education and worked in a job for a few years to be able to provide financially for bringing up a baby because all that costs money and to bring up a child in poverty and without having a proper education makes it really tough. Some are mature enough at age 21 to make good parents. I personally believe a woman should have her first child at the very latest by age 35 otherwise she is too old. It's not nice for the child if all the other mom's are so young and they think grandma is taking the kid to school but then again, there is no law against it. Young has it's advantages and older has its advantages as well. The older parents are financially more stable. They have built up their career and can take a break. There are some responsible enough under the age of 20 of course and they can make good mom's but in that case the dad has to at least be older and he must have a job where he can earn enough to pay for rent, food, the baby has needs and I believe a young couple has advantages if they have some ''alone time'' first before they become parents. if they get time to grow together as man and woman, then they can still have a family.. a womans most fertile years for having babies is until she is 25 years old after that it slowly declines and by age 40 if a woman never was able to get pregnant.. her chances of having a baby without invitro fertilisation is almost impossible unless she becomes a mom for the 3rd or 4th time by age of 40.. that happens more often than that a woman becomes a mom for the first time at age 40 and those who do, such as Nicole Kidman, they are rich and they probably did have invitro fertilization and I am sure she can financially provide well for the child. There are great and responsible young women who are 17 and take good care of their baby and then there are 23 year olds who throw their new born baby in a rubbish bin.. I believe all has to do with the mental maturity of the person not so much with the actual age of the mom of the baby.. a 17 year old can be mature enough and a 23 year old can be immature and actually be a bad mom..  and really neglect the child and the same can happen if a woman is too old.. she might start menopause soon after and then to have a little baby around will make it harder for her to cope. There are different sides to it. I don't think it can be tied down to age alone. All depends on the individual people and on the individual circumstances.. 17 can be ok and 40 can be ok .. it all depends on a lot more than age alone. There are good and bad parents of all age groups I am not prejudiced either way.

Answer 12

It depends entirely on the person.

For me I know I would have been terrible in my teens, I was far too selfish ( although who knows how I would have adapted ) I enjoyed my early 20's then had my first at 28.

In the ward, I was the oldest swinger in town, we were talking Crumpsall, Manchester (think Shameless C4 lol). The nurses kept asking if I was sure it was my first!

I think I did it just right for me.

I wouldn't have another I feel too old, I have been saying this for a few years now, prob since 35 I've felt too old to start again.

I'm not even saying I'm great.

Sometimes I'll have a little frustrated weep that its hard ~ but we are the closest little gang of 3 ever me and my 2 little girls.

Answer 13

What are my views and experiences on this?

Like everything else in life, it would be discrimination to say that all young parents are terrible and all old parents are good, or vice versa.  I have seen good parents and bad parents, age does not define parenting skills.  You seem to be indicating that older parents are terrible and younger parents are awesome.  Discrimination!  You can't generalize like that.  Especially if you don't like it when people generalize about young parents.

I have to say though, that perhaps why people feel this way is when they see 14 year olds strutting down the street, in spike heels, mini skirts, smoking cigarettes and swearing to their friends - all while pushing a baby stroller.

On the reverse side of that, I don't agree with the 65 year old woman who recently got pregnant either.  

Who Do I think make the best parents?

People who are stable, emotional and financially, mature, and love their children unconditionally.  People who know how to discipline (without resorting to physical punishment) and teach their children their values and morals.  People who make time for their children and take the parenting responsibility seriously.  Whether or not you think age is a factor in that definition is up to you,.

Answer 14

Its not about the age, its about the person.