Your reaction? If you invited friends to your wedding but they refused because they don't like weddings?

Question

Could you forgive that decision on their part, or do you feel they are obliged to go to your wedding no matter what?

Answer 1

they are obliged. a wedding is about the people getting married, not the people in attendance. they should think about you and not themselves.  

Answer 2

That's like saying you're not going to a funeral because you don't like funerals. How incredibly rude to give that as an excuse. Are they close friends, or people you are only friendly with? Either way, they could have  totally made up an excuse to not come if they were dead set against attending.

That's a horrible reason to not attend. I know that sometimes, wedding aren't something people look forward to, but you go to be a supportive friend or family member. Kind of part of life. Grow up and deal. Gosh!

If this was a close friend or family member, I would be rather upset about it. Would I cut them out of my life? No. But I would know what kind of friend they are ... not a good one.

Answer 3

This actually happened to my fiance. He invited one of his best friends and he told him no because he didn't do weddings. Needless to say they are no longer friends. I say they never really were.

Answer 4

They aren't obliged to do anything they don't want to do!  They aren't as good friends as you thought, I guess, or they'd want to see your happy day.

Congratulations, you just save money on their dinners...spend it on someone who does like weddings.

Answer 5

Technically, if they have no real reason not to.. they should be obligated to come to the wedding. But you can't make people do what they don't want to do. Maybe they could come celebrate with you at the reception? Maybe it's just the ceremony part they are not into.  

Answer 6

That's such a cop out.  

I don't like funerals, but I still go to them to help celebrate the life of the deceased.

They're your friends.  Whether they like weddings or not, they should WANT to be there to see you start a new chapter in your life.  That's what friends do - be there for each other.  

If that happened to me, I'd be hurt and angry.  

Answer 7

They are selfish and I wouldnt talk to them anymore.

Answer 8

Are they close friends?  I just don't get it , is is that they are not married or they can't afford a gift

that is sad,  anyway congrats and don't let the poopers ruin your day,

May sunshine and rainbows colour your hearts ,  a forever be love!

Answer 9

I'll confess that I was a little when I threw my wedding and some of the people I thought we were close to didn't come and didn't give any excuse.  That being said, nobody is obligated to attend a wedding.  The reason the rsvp cards say yes or no, and don't require to write in a reason is because attending the wedding is completely optional.  I've since gotten over it and completely forgiven those people.  I threw an awesome party and for the ones who didn't come, they're the ones who missed out.

Answer 10

Yes, it is rude of them, but honestly, no one is 'obligated to go to your wedding no matter what'.  

Answer 11

I'd say wtf and say,look at all the things I did for you!

Answer 12

I understand the difference between an invitation and a mandate. I wouldn’t be offended at having an invitation turned down – that’s the invitee’s given right. It is a bit crass to blame not liking weddings as an excuse to not attend but that’s a personal choice.

The way the invitation was turned down is a bit unnecessary, but I wouldn’t let the situation worry me. Someone’s lack of attended doesn’t have any affect on the overall purpose of the day.

Answer 13

I would question their friendship. I don't think a friend should feel obligated, I think a friend would just plain want to go, to share this important event with you.

This friend is not much of a friend.

Answer 14

Don't worry be happy

Answer 15

They arent truly your friends if they give you some lame excuse as to why they wont come to your wedding. Unless they had a valid reason, I would be pissed enough to probably sever ties with them.

Just b/c "they dont like weddings" is rude and Im shocked someone would be that rude to your face and give you such a lame excuse.

If they do refuse, just let it go and consider them very far acquaintances if even that in the future.

Answer 16

They could be just as pissed at you for making them go as you could be for them not showing up. If they're your FRIENDS, and you KNOW this about them, why are you deliberately putting them on the spot? You can't go out to dinner with them some other time? You're going to make them have to spend a fortune on clothes they'll wear once again in their lives and sit listening to a service of a religion they probably don't even belong to? Yeah it's your day, but share it with people who WANT to be there and aren't guilted or pressured into it. Selfishness.

And all you "they have to be there by the law of the world" people are sheep.

Answer 17

Forgive what? No one is "obligated" to go anywhere.

So they declined the invitation. Stop being a big baby and get over it.

Good luck

PS/ No wonder people do not like weddings. People seem obligated to go, buy a shower gift, buy a wedding gift and then get trapped on those stupid money-grabbing schemes such as the money dance, the money tree, the money bags... times are though and people are wising up!

Answer 18

I wouldn't say they are obligated and while I would like them to come it's nothing to get too bend out of shape about.  Is it silly on their part?  Maybe.  But they think that you are silly probably for having the wedding at all.  Just don't worry about it and enjoy saving on the cost of their plate.    (Note - if they are good friends one would think they would grin and bear it....are they having financial difficulties and don't want anyone to know/bother anyone with them?)

Answer 19

What kind of a friend would skip out on one of the most important days of your life with a lame-axe excuse like "I don't like weddings". A true-blue friend sucks it up and attends and is even *gasp* happy for you!

Answer 20

Unless there is a moral or religious issue, a true friend would go and support you regardless.  So if I received that reaction from someone I thought was my friend, they would no longer be my friend at that point!  It's not about the wedding, it's about the people!

Answer 21

i'd think their selfish and cheap!

Answer 22

If my friend didn't go to my wedding because they don't like weddings, I wouldn't bother to go to their own wedding.  If they didn't go because they suffer an anxiety disorder or some other illness that makes them very unhappy at such an occasion, I would just let that pass by and attend the wedding. My wedding is small not only because I wanted it small but also because 2 attendees actually do have an anxiety disorder and are very uncomfortable in groups.

Answer 23

Are you people serious, you'd dump a friend because they choose not to come to your wedding? Some people get some hard core social anxiety. No one is "obligated" to go to anyone's wedding.

Get over yourselves.

Answer 24

I'd laugh because I remember saying the same thing at certain points in my life. It'd be fine with me because I value their friendship more than their presence at my wedding. And I understand, I don't hold them to any obligations and vice versa. My friends and I are pretty open and I can actually think of a few who would tell me this if it came up!

If they don't go, it's their loss. I'd rather have them not be there than be there and be falsely happy or openly miserable.

Answer 25

well if u dont rrespect my marrige then how cares