Your view on the difference between a man/woman hitting the other?

Question

I'd like to see what your different takes are on the event of a man striking a woman, versus a woman hitting a man?

It is obvious that a man hitting a woman, for any reason, at any time, is uncalled for, VERY wrong, disgraceful, and in a marriage can result in a domestic assault charge.

However, if a woman hits a man, usually no matter what happened, the guy is seen as deserving of it, the guy must never respond violently, and it is usually never reported as an assault.

How did society create this different view on striking someone of the opposite s*x, especially with all that women have fought for with equality? Why do you think men are seen as undeserving of as much respect?

I am NOT saying in anyway that I disagree with how this is viewed, as I think hitting a woman is one of the lowest things a man could do.

This is simply my interest in how it is viewed on both sides, what is "acceptable", and why they are so different?

Answer 1

I don't think most people view domestic violence as acceptable regardless of gender.  I do think that male victims are embarrassed of being beaten up by a woman, and that others may be skeptical about it, both leading to a failure to report it or talk about it.  But I have known male victims with big strong wives, and male victims with tiny wives who threw dishes and came after them with knives and guns as well as slaps.  I guess their first instinct is to be chivalrous, their second one to defend themselves, and their third is to hide what feels shameful.

Answer 2

In your "defense", I TOTALLY understand your confusion! REALISTICALLY, NO ONE AT ANY TIME SHALL ASSAULT/HARM with willful intent under no circumstances. IF WE ALL (men & women/boys & girls) made this a habit in EVERYDAY life, it merely wouldn't be an issue. The best thing to do is TR not to facilitate and/or be in an evironment where such tension can migrate to worse.

Answer 3

I had a girlfriend beat on me pretty hard about 20 years ago,  Some people think I'm too sensitive, but I don't hang out with women who are in the habit of jokingly, hitting people.  If a guy hits me and I don't like it, I can hit him back.  I think that the perception of a double standard is because guys don't do or say anything about it they just take it. I will tell a woman immediatly that I would really appreciate it if they never hit me again.  If there isn't anyone else around I will tell them that my experience is that people that like to jokingly hit people hit a lot harder when they're angry.  I come off as being a spoil sport or a party pooper, but I don't get hit anymore.

Answer 4

What I have seen change in my 35 years of existance is how many woman have become the aggressive perpetrators in a relationship or an argument and in self-defense, their male partner pushes or pulls them away and being the male is stronger, usually, ends up hurting the woman.  So the woman or police press charges on the man for defending himself and nothing happens to the real perpetrator.  This scenario is much more common that many are willing to believe.  I think the problem lies in why someone would want to stay in a situation where one feels enough anger to want to physically hurt the person they claim to love, because that isn't love.  I believe it's human nature to defend yourself but at the same time, to not want to cause harm.   There is never a reason for violence, it's completely unacceptable.

Answer 5

I have always been of the view that what you hand out, you must be prepared to receive. I taught my kids, boys and a girl, if you hurt someone, be prepared to be hurt back, sometimes what you get back is twice as hard as the hurt you dealt out. My motto: keep your hands, fists, hurtful words to yourself and you will be unharmed.

Answer 6

This is just my take on this scenario. It is based on the ethos I was raised with and live by to this very day.

"A male never strikes a female!" "A female may strike a male but the male is ever and always strong enough to withstand and overcome!"

Don't get me wrong. There has been more than one female in my life that has tested me on this belief. But never once, in over 60 years of my life have I touched a female in anger!

Answer 7

men are not undeserving of the same respect, it is the old double standard that are placed on men still today that they are suppose to be tough, not suppose to cry, etc. it would be devastating for most mens ego to report that their wife or significant other had abused them.  If not for the male ego, then the cops would be called just as if it had been a woman.

Answer 8

Bottom line, men have considerably more upper body strength, so the same hit from a woman and from a man would be radically different.  

No, it's not OK for people to hit each other.  It's domestic abuse no matter which gender does it, but men tend not to report being hit by their female mates.

The number one cause of death of pregnant women is homicide caused by their mates.



A woman's attempt to leave an abuser was the precipitating factor in 45 percent of the murders of women by their intimate partners.

Answer 9

A man is supposed to be big and strong to protect their woman from anything that would threaten her, be it wild animal or another man.  Women have never been seen as a physical threat towards a man so when she becomes the abuser society doesn't quite know what do.  That's how we've been raised.

Spousal abuse by a woman is rarely reported because the husband is ostricized by his peers for letting a woman beat on him but, then if he defends himself he's the one punished by the law and society.

I think that when a woman becomes violent with a man, be it her husband or boyfriend, society views him as deserving the abuse because so many women over the centuries were abused and the abuse was defended by society.  "Her father or husband has the right to beat her".

What is acceptable?  Violence to either s*x should be un-acceptable.  The only acceptable violence, in my opinion, is self-defense for both sexes.  If a woman strikes a man, he should be able to physically defend himself and she should be made to suffer the consequences under the letter of the law.

Answer 10

in my opinion it is the same either way, if a man hits me he better expect me to hit back, and if I hit a man, I fully expect him to hit me back.. it shouldn't matter that I'm a girl, people just shouldn't hit other people in general.