I've found an interesting article here, to spark a serious debate on marriage and what it means to men.
http://www.bestlifeonline.com/cms/publish/s*x-relationships/Sudden_Divorce_Syndrome_printer.shtml
What do you think of it? Do you have any personal stories?
"But for many men, the real pain isn’t financial, it’s emotional: “Men depend on women for their social support and connections,†says Buckley. “When marriages end, men can find themselves far more alone than they ever expected.†In a large-scale Canadian survey, 19 percent of men reported a significant drop in social support post divorce. Women are customarily the keepers of the social calendars, and all that is implied by that, providing for what University of Texas sociologist Norval D. Glenn calls the “intangibles†that can create much of a man’s sense of place in the world. More often than not, wives send out the Christmas cards; they stitched that cute Halloween costume their daughter wore in second grade; they recall the names of the neighbors who used to live two houses down. The men who bear all these unexpected burdens do so alone, in a strange place, while their ex-wives and children live in the houses that used to be theirs. For an ex-husband to enter that house can feel like trespassing, even though it was paid for with his own money, or sometimes, built with his own hands."
“Marriage changes men more pervasively and more profoundly than it changes women,†explains sociologist Steven Nock, author of Marriage in Men’s Lives. “The best way to put it is, marriage is for men what motherhood is for women.†Marriage makes men grow up. Nock observes that many men before marriage are indifferent workers, and, after hours, are likely to be found in bars or zoned out in front of a TV. After marriage, they are solid wage earners, frequent churchgoers, maybe members of a neighborhood protection association. But divorce takes that underpinning away, leaving men strangely infantilized and unsure of their place in the world. They feel like interlopers in the stands at their children’s soccer games or in the auditorium for their school"
Tags: